Want to join in? Respond to our weekly writing prompts, open to everyone.
Want to join in? Respond to our weekly writing prompts, open to everyone.
from chaosorc
Got up and did a different rendition of a song I wrote in the nineties. Thinking about Interstellar a lot. Cooper receiving messages and his daughter getting older, when he returns they are the same age, he lost twenty-three years.
•
Trying everything I can to avoid cleaning up what I've written because it will take so long, there is so much written. Then it's spilled over on to the Internet. Now I understand these authors who post what they are doing then suddenly everything is removed and it's like, wait for the book. The review and editing process looks like it will take awhile.
And when the time is right and when the end has come maybe you can't be arsed for half a million – The Smile, Read the Room
How much worse can it get
It depends what else I remember
But you have your whole life ahead of you
Not if I keep looking behind me
How do you get out of it
I only have to be strong enough to pull the trigger one time
•
It all flows downhill
Where is it going
Compressing in a mass
One final lump?
If there were enough it would catch fire
Become a star?
Eventually a black hole
Pull in all the matter around it
One final massive fuck you
Is that how you are going to go?
No, this is about me
•
Would you? Could you? In a tub?
Cut them! Soak them! Here they are.
I would not, could not, in a tub.
•
You could reach out and ask her if you could just be friends
That's helpful
They were interrupted by voices outside, men yelling at eachother, a door slamming.
All the units were separate in the center. Cinder block squares with inner walls to separate the toilet, shower, and sink from the kitchen on the other side of the wall that stretched to the refrigerator. The desk and chair in the corner that served as a dining table or workspace. Twin bed dominating the corner of the room, no space for an end table or book shelf just a few milk crates piled up under the desk, kicked further back each day, newspaper reading or radio listening. He sat on the bed by the door and she was at the desk, chair turned to face him.
One sec
There were no windows in the unit so he had to open the door.
Two men stood on the other side of his sunfaded yellow compact car.
One drew a pistol from his pants and the other looked angry so he pulled the trigger and a small hole appeared in the front of the man but behind him a gout of blood hit the wall. The man dropped to one knee and gripped the hole in the front, tried to exhale but something was now missing.
The man with the pistol put it away and climbed into a pickup truck, it started with a growl and tires spun kicking gravel around the lot as tires chirped onto the dusky street.
He ran to check on the man with the hole and looked down. He was trying to cough but there was nothing there anymore. His face crossed, one hand reaching out, he was pleading, bargaining.
He knelt next to the man and took his hand and the man joined him in mourning, quietly dying next to him.
The sound of the street and the college town came up, a stereo too loud, people shuffling in their units, someone screaming into a phone, he's been shot.
The lips blue, skin growing pale, eyes that were pinched shut now slightly open and distant, hair flutter.
What does love look like
Who the fuck knows
What does love feel like
Giving or receiving
Do you spell that with capital letters
They laughed. It was starting to get dark, the street lights coming on in the parking lot. They waited by the exit with the diner and people rushed past.
A couple with interlocked pinky fingers, lots of face piercings, hair long and unkempt, bouncing as they walked in step with eachother. His pants sagging and cuffs a bit worn behind his sneaker heels. Her clothes were tight fitting except for the sweatshirt, a large dark blob with jagged and smeared looking words on the back, probably her boyfriend's.
I bet they could tell you
Why don't we ask
Be my guest
Can't, love-shy.
She looked at him and smirked.
You learn something new every day
Learn something new every day
He passed her the cigarette and she took a drag, dipping the ash off onto the side of his bluejeans, watched the embers fade in the cuff, smiled at the ring on his engineer's boots.
You think he puts a leash on her
Why
Look at how they hold hands, it's like they're connected
What if she puts one on him
I don't fuckin know
She passed the cigarette back and he held it in his hands and watched them get into their car. A white Mitsubishi eclipse.
Strange coupe
What?
Their car, it's a strange coupe
You think the stereo is any good
Fuck no
What do they do in there when they're driving
Talk, touch the cock
Is that what we're gonna do?
If you play your cards right
After the other couple drove away her gaze drifted back to the cigarette and when he noticed he handed it back. She dipped the long ash onto the side of his leg again and it tumbled into the cuff.
She looked up and he was smiling at her, staring right into her eyes.
She took a drag as an excuse to cover her face, pushed her hair out of her eyes, gave him the predator look and then coughed because she had inhaled too much.
He smirked and looked away.
She broke my heart
You broke your heart
What do you mean
What did she tell you
She said she didn't want to move too fast
And what did you do
I know
No, say it, Davis wants to hear. Gabe is waiting. We all want you to say what you did.
He looked nervously around the circle of people sitting in their fold out chairs in the meeting hall, their voices echoing. This time no orderly, doctor was away somewhere else in the institution. It was just the patients and Fielding.
I counted the number of text messages she sent me each day.
And then
Then I made a spreadsheet.
Davis had been sitting back in his seat, his fingers between his teeth, occasionally running a hand through his hair, whenever things got too heated, when it looked like Andy was going to cry again. He asked, how is that moving too fast?
How does counting the number of messages a person sends you every day and then putting that number and the date into a spreadsheet lead to moving too fast? Is that what you're asking?
Fielding looked angry, there was a sweat or grease on him now, Davis sunk in his chair, he did not want the attention. He looked around and the entire group was looking at him.
Gabe tried to intervene, he had been sitting casually, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees. Did you tell her?
Everyone looked back at Andy.
What do you think
You can tell us, use your words, Andy.
Fuck
A low chuckle spread through the room.
Yeah, it's alright. Laugh it up. You'll all get your turn.
The words could've come from anyone but they were surprised because it was the newcomer. They turned to face them.
I just want to bury myself in her
And then what
Then lose myself in her, she can dissolve me and absorb me
That's not how people operate
I know, it's codependent and addictive behavior
Probably a bit manic too
Yeah
And what happens when she stops you
They don't let me get that close anymore
Is this part of that six foot social distance thing you keep talking about
You know what this is part of
How would you like things to go
Like, if I were healthy
Yeah, spell it out for me, take me through it backwards
He snorted. The doctor waited with his pen hand resting on the clipboard.
We would wake up in bed together, she would have slept over and into the morning.
That's how it ends?
That is the end that I want.
Okay, and what happened before that?
Fucken
Alright.
And before that we are at, he searched the doctor's face and there was still no sign of emotion, wherever people fuck now.
You don't know?
Haven't found out.
The doctor wrote something down.
So we are there and we are talking about whatever people say before they have sex.
The doctor was staring blankly at him again, a hint of interest.
Before that maybe we trade ess tee eye tests, he smirked but still nothing.
And you arrive at this place from what?
Drove there after the date, maybe we were seeing a movie. Talking in the parking lot and walking to the car.
How is the conversation?
I want to share something with her, to be vulnerable. And, for her to share something back that I can understand, something that makes me feel a deeper connection. To make me invite her to sex.
She doesn't invite you?
Do women do that now?
The doctor wrote again.
Great.
The woman's howl, the distortion and drums, crash of symbols. The guitar stepping from note to note in a repetitive way. The song is about regret. She took a knife and opened herself up, created a beautiful wound for him, welcomed him in. And he did not notice. Now it is just this gaping portal for the bugs, dirt, lint. She is begging for bandages, a salve, some kind of care or attention, affection. And eventually she screams that she wants to be taken. But he won't.
Why does this art look so dated
What do you mean
Misshapen heads, busy in the wrong places, the colors are strange, a lot of yellow and orange in with the black, and there's not enough of that
It's almost fourteen years old
All of it
Was that a question
He continued to flip through the portfolio.
Why fourteen years?
He's an alcoholic.
Drunks don't paint?
A silence between them, he continued to turn pages.
No, I don't like it
Alright, I'll let him know
Tell him to get out, go to some openings, see the world, maybe turn on a television
I got it
I want to help him but, who did you say this guy was again?
They reminded him.
Fuck. He thought for a moment, looking out the front window of the gallery at the street to cleanse his palette. What a fucking waste.
Why don't you remove her
What
They were sitting at the all night diner. Hashbrowns spread out on the plate in front of him, a bottle of vinegar hot sauce on one side and a napkin on the other. He picked it up, pulled off the small red cap, and shook it vigorously.
Why would I do that
Why wouldn't you do that. You're fucking miserable.
What if she noticed?
What if she didn't
He stopped the shaking and twisted the cap on slowly then stared into his friend's eyes across the table.
A group of people younger than both of them had appeared in the club. They wore paper party hats and carried party blowers, wore plastic frames like glasses. They were laughing, talking too loud, greeting eachother as they arrived. Intoxicated.
Haven't you given her enough
What do you mean
Your time, your attention. You are living in mourning. You look at her shit
Okay
He paused waiting for some concession but his friend looked lost in thought, looking through the party that was seated in the center of the diner next to them.
Okay what, you're gonna remove her
Okay I get it, man.
I don't think you do. I think you need closure. And you are never going to get it. You have to make a moment.
Try to see her again?
Fuck no, are you even listening to me
They locked stares again, his friend was angry and he didn't seem to understand why.
I just want her to let me go
You need to let her go
Why couldn't we just have a fight
And make up
He thought about it, seemed to be coming to some kind of understanding, then someone dropped a flask on the table next to them, the smell of whiskey.
He took the dishes she left behind out to the dump and threw them one by one into the dumpster watching them break apart. Next, the photographs in the frames, most printed out from cell phone pictures taken when they started dating and were still going out together, willing to have their pictures taken. Then photos of the dogs when they were young or puppies, when they were still alive. He watched the glass break, the photos drift out of reach, some settling face down, others torn from the force, sometimes a dog or her face smiling up at him, eternally frozen on vacation and young.
from Cheri's Blog
Good morning, fellow bookworms.
Have you read anything great lately? I'm still nibbling my way through Martha Wells's The Witch King. I started it a few months back, but I wasn't in the right headspace for it at the time. It's really good, though! Very different from her Murderbot novels.
I’m penning this letter on a train to Madrid, watching the green and tan patchwork quilt of agricultural Spain fly by. We just passed a huge field of wind turbines, calling to mind that most famous Spanish novel Don Quijote, whose titular hero mistook windmills for his enemies and attacked them, his sword drawn.
I have yet to read Don Quijote, but it's on my someday list. 😌
Patrick and I enjoyed (and should I say, survived?) the culmination of the Fallas festival in Valencia. There were loud marching bands and loud pyrotechnic explosions right outside our window until five in the morning, all week. We had a blast (ha ha literally) and by the end, my brain felt like it had been pushed through a cheese grater.
While Fallas is most known for the enormous monuments, which are burned on the final night of the festival, I was most impressed by something else. Outside the main cathedral, an enormous wooden woman (the local aspect of the Virgin Mary) was erected, and over a course of two days, locals in traditional garb (called falleras and falleros) paraded through the streets carrying red and white carnations. Climbers filled the wooden body with the flowers, forming a beautiful cape and gown. More than 100,000 people participated in the ceremony, which is called La Ofrenda, or in English, the offering.
I kept looking around and wondering what Ellie Tappet might make of all these happenings in Valencia. I'm pretty sure she'd love that flower ceremony. As for the demon children throwing lit fireworks into crowds all week? Well, perhaps not so much. 😏 And as for me, I was grateful for the chance to experience something new.
Even if it meant losing some sleep.
Oh, and Happy Easter to all who celebrate! Do you have any springtime traditions? Back home in Seattle, I’d be walking down to Pike Place Market to pick up fresh tulips from the flower vendors, enjoying the explosion of color that occurs down there this time of year. Or maybe slicing open a package of marshmallow Peeps to get them perfectly stale before I eat them.
Hey! It’s traditional. 😜
I’m still scribbling away, making progress on my books. Speaking of which, I have some time until our stop, so I should make the most of it.
Until next time!
Cheri B.
This letter was sent to my newsletter subscribers via email. If you’d like to receive these notes in your inbox, along with discounts, new releases, and a free starter library, you can sign up here.
from Kroeber
A música d'“A garota não” magoa-me. É uma dor boa, imensa e vulnerável. Uma sensação semelhante a estar vivo, ou ao acto de olhar para cantos do meu íntimo algo esquecidos.
from chaosorc
What about you, Carl
Oh I get out there
They laughed, Logan held up three more beers.
Sure
Anyway
No anyway, talk, Carl
Well since yall are being so forthcoming
Logan popped the caps off and handed them out, Jeff's was still half full.
Carl took a tug on the new beer and set it next to the empty.
I ordered some food and she showed up
Showed up and fucked you
That's a prostitute bro
Alright, anyway
No wait
What was she dropping off
Birra tacos
Taco truck drop off
Taco truck fuck
They laughed some more, Jeff looked from the beers in front of him to the beers in front of Logan who was also pacing himself. Carl took another drink, nearing half full.
She handed me my shit and asked, how are you. We had this conversation and I said you should call me later we can chat.
Nice
What did she look like
What was she wearing
What were you wearing
They laughed.
Who gives a fuck
We do, bro
Look I told you, these chicks want looks or money, that's all they care about. You must have been radiating something.
I don't know I mean I was just hungry
Logan and Jeff looked at eachother, picked up their beers, crossed the necks of their bottles, and downed half their bottles.
Oh come on
Nah, something's up
Yeah, she psycho or something
Look like a hag
Fucked up pussy
No she was super cool
You fuck her
Yeah, she asked me to
How polite
Nothing polite about it
I bet
They laughed.
Please, Carl, he said it mockingly like a woman's voice, she probably said it with a hard arr.
Carl, they traded his name back and forth drawing it out and turning it into pirate noises.
Carl looked at his phone, the last message he sent a week ago sitting on delivered status.
All for one or none at all
Look, I told you I'd fuck you okay
You were serious
Yeah but we aren't doing onesies it's all for one or none at all
Really
Yeah but we are gonna need some condoms because nobody's raw dogging me
That's fine
Then lets go get condoms
You're good to drive?
Yeah, we've just been watching Carl put it away
Well shit lets go
She opened a different cabinet and opened the crock pot, she put the vodka bottle on top of a waiting plastic bottle of cinnamon schnapps.
The fuck
You dicks never cook, best place to hide it
She pushed Jeff back with one hand on his chest and stepped up nose to nose with Logan, don't go spilling my secrets
Logan gulped, yes ma'am
The three went out the front door and didn't even lock it.
Look at that piece of meat
Are you going to take it
Be patient
I'll take it if you don't want
He pressed the blade into the man's chest so he could feel the tip through his leather harness.
They both stared at the same woman, chained to the table, hindquarters exposed. A bit of drool dripped out of the shorter man's mask.
I need this
And you'll have this
But you first
He frowned, the mask let out a slight squeak.
The other man grinned, the mask laces groaned at the back of his head and it made him grin wider.
Why is all this insane shit happening
Why isn't all of this insane shit happening
There's a knife on the table by your bed
And you have what, lubricants and condoms and amyl nitrate, he laughed
Yeah I fuck like a normal person, Mark
He laughed even more and his hand hit the table, heavy, people turned to look quick like they expected a car accident. He held up his hands and tried to catch his breath. My bad
She looked at him incredulously, pushed her hair away but it was just an excuse to cover her face.
Oh hey now don't be shy
I'm not doing this here, Mark
Eat your hashbrowns
Drink your juice, her hand coming up from the edge of the table to flip him off where no one else could see it.
A pleased expression crossed his face and his eyes went soft.
I really like you
I like you too, her eyes softened in response
Formaldehyde skin pulled tight behind a gauzy veil. A grave face speckled with desilvered mirror tarnish, punctuated by two strained eyes widening in their sockets. You note a clumsiness in gait and stature. Self-mortifying shades of famine. Bones sunk at outrageous angles. Cheeks etched to cut glass. Lurching side-to-side my other wavers in the hallway, her weeping crepe projecting poisonous rasping.
▽ | #autofiction #relic
from FANTASTICO!
Benvenute creature all’appuntamento con il racconto del mese dello Scartafaccio.
Prima di tutto voglio scusarmi. Questo mese non ho scritto la consueta newsletter. Ci ho rimuginato sopra per giorni interni, ma quando alla fine ho realizzato che non avevo nulla di intelligente da dire, ho deciso che avrei lasciato perdere quel numero. Troverete in coda a questo racconto un paio di fonti interessanti per approfondire la vostra conoscenza sui draghi.
Ma passiamo al racconto. Questo mese mi sono stati inviati ben dieci racconti. È già da un po’ che ho capito che i temi fantasy “tirano” di più e questo non ha fatto eccezione. Inoltre è stata alta, ben quattro racconti, anche la partecipazione femminile.
Gli approcci al tema sono stati molto diversi tra loro. Vi sono stati racconti classici con gli stereotipi ribaltati, avventure urban fantasy, guerre un po’ steampunk. Sono state letture molto interessanti e anche il livello di scrittura è stato bello alto, considerato quanto sia piccolo questo contest.
Ma passiamo al racconto vincitore:
“I draghi non esistono!” Giampaolo – forse sette anni – era infinitamente sicuro di sé. Se ne stava a guardarmi a braccia conserte, con un’espressione serissima e un po’ comica, sotto la zazzera bionda e gli occhialetti tondi che ricordavano quelli del maghetto di un’antica saga fantasy. “Sono una leggenda, una storia per bambini, tipo Babbo Natale, il Mostro Sotto il Letto, la Fatina dei Denti…”.
“Non garantisco per Babbo Natale o il Mostro Sotto il Letto, ma ti assicuro che la Fatina…” Cominciai a rispondergli, ma mi interruppe, con una certa spocchia.
“Guarda che non sono più un moccioso. I miei genitori mi stanno crescendo in maniera onesta ed obiettiva, senza frottole. Mi hanno spiegato che le fiabe e i babau sono dei simboli, figure inventate per indirizzare un bambino a comportarsi bene, a seguire gli insegnamenti degli adulti…”
“Se sei tanto furbo dovresti sapere che il babau non è un simbolo, è un dolce…” provai a rimetterlo al suo posto con un mezzo sorrisino, ma mi gelò.
“Quello semmai è il babà!”
“Ah, già!” Che figuraccia, mi confondo sempre. “Ma sulla fatina, davvero, ho le prove!”
“Sarà una mezza foto sfocata come quelle del mostro di Lochness…” Si voltò dall’altra parte con una mezza risatina.
“Eh, no!” Cominciavo a offendermi. “Intanto tu mio cugino non lo prendi in giro, e poi, vieni con me!” Senza neanche controllare se mi stesse seguendo, imboccai il corridoio e mi diressi a grandi falcate verso il mio antro da letto. Mi fermai solo di fronte al mio giaciglio, e allora mi voltai.
“Ecco, ne sei convinto, ora?” Alle mie spalle, però, non c’era nessuno. Spazientito, tornai sui miei passi. Giampaolo aveva effettivamente cominciato a seguirmi, ma era così lento che aveva appena lasciato l’antro da pranzo. “Allora, ti muovi?” Lo spronai.
“Mica ho le gambe lunghe venti metri come le tue!” Si giustificò.
“Ho le gambe lunghe perché sono un drago!” Puntualizzai.
“I draghi non esistono.” Scosse la testa di nuovo. Sembrava gli facessi un po’ pena.
“E allora come le giustifichi la mia statura imponente?” Chiesi con orgoglio.
“Una forma di gigantismo.”
“E la pelle verde e scagliosa?” Provai di nuovo.
“Una brutta ittiosi, o più probabilmente un brutto costume.”
“E il fatto che sputi fuoco?” Sbottai.
“Un lanciafiamme perfettamente integrato nel costume.”
“E il fatto che ti abbia rapito e ti abbia portato fin qui volando?” Pensai che non potesse non cedere. E invece…
“Una simulazione in ambiente VR. Carina, ma neanche troppo realistica. Che poi, ecco, perché mi avresti rapito se sei davvero un drago? Lo sanno tutti che nelle fiabe i draghi rapiscono le principesse.”
“Ma quella è una leggenda.” Sbuffai. “Cosa se ne dovrebbe fare un drago di una principessa? Intanto sono viziate, costosissime da mantenere, eppoi non posso mica sposarla. A me piacciono le draghesse.”
“E allora perché non hai rapito una draghessa?”
“Sono un gentildrago, le draghesse non si rapiscono: si conquistano con lettere d’amore, doni, mixtape in musicassetta…”
“Mixche?”
“Sei troppo giovane, non puoi capire.”
“Boomer. Quindi vorresti regalarmi a una draghessa?”
“No di certo. Le ho preso un braccialetto. Ti ho rapito perché voglio mangiarti.”
“Mangiarmi?” Scoppiò a ridere. “Ma nessuno mangia più bambini dal 1989!”
Non risposi neppure. Anche perché eravamo finalmente arrivati nell’antro da letto.
“Ecco, guarda qui.” Indicai il mio giaciglio.
“Cosa dovrei guardare?” Faceva ancora il duro, ma finalmente sembrava sorpreso dallo splendore di fronte ai suoi occhi. Oro, gioielli, tesori provenienti da ogni tempo. Se non si rimane stupiti di fronte al bottino di un drago…
“Sotto il cuscino!”
“Non vedo nessun cuscino!” Protestò.
“Uso quel mucchio di monete d’oro come cuscino. Le vedi? Ecco. Qualche sera fa mi è caduto un dente, stavo mangiando una zuppa di tartarughe e mi ero dimenticato di togliere il guscio, un dolore... Ho messo il dentino sotto il cuscino e la mattina dopo non c’era più, ma al suo posto c’era un’altra moneta d’oro. Come lo spieghi?”
“Ci sono monete d’oro ovunque, qui…” Allargò le braccia. “Come fai ad accorgerti se ce n’è una in più?”
“Lo so e basta. Un drago sa sempre quante monete d’oro ci sono nel suo antro.”
“E quante sarebbero, esattamente?”
“Un milionequattrocentoventiduemilasettecentoventinove.”
“E con tutti questi soldi non potresti andare al ristorante, invece che rapire un bambino per mangiarlo?” Mentre pronunciava la parola fece il gesto delle virgolette con le dita, come se ancora considerasse questa storia assurda.
“Non mi sono certo procurato tutte queste monete per spenderle al ristorante…” Scossi il capo.
“E allora per cosa?”
“Collezionismo.”
“Io colleziono minerali.”
“Andresti d’accordo coi nani.”
“I nani non esistono. Perlomeno, non quelli delle fiabe. Esistono persone affette da quello che comunemente viene detto “nanismo”, ma forse sarebbe meglio definirli “persone verticalmente svantaggiate, e…”
“BASTA!”
Lo abbrustolii con una fiammata.
Era morbidissimo. Perfetto con il mio mal di denti. Ma la prossima volta mi sa che rapisco una principessa davvero.
Michele Borgogni è uno scrittore. Fin da bambino si diverte a gettare le sue idee su carta, senza porsi paletti di generi, personaggi, ambientazioni. Ha scritto racconti e romanzi, horror e fantascienza, libri di ricette e romanzi sportivi sui dinosauri, storie di kebabbari nello spazio e ucronie storiche. Pubblica sia da indipendente che per case editrici, in particolare con Dark Abyss Edizioni.
Ehilà. Se siete arrivati fin qui sotto avete proprio un interesse speciale per i draghi. Qui le due fondi promesse.
Storia naturale dei draghi (in inglese)
E con questo è tutto. Se vi è piaciuta questa letterina fatela conoscere al mondo, inoltratela, stampatela. E soprattutto fatemelo sapere: basta rispondere alla mail.
from An Open Letter
Tomorrow morning at 11 AM I have an interview with Amazon for a SWE internship. I’m definitely nervous but here’s to hoping everything works out and goes well.
Also today, I was in Costco, and I was almost moved to tears several times by some songs – specifically “Piano Concerto No. 2 in C Minor Op. 18” by Rachmaninoff. The song was written after a long depression and was dedicated to his psychiatrist for helping him get out of it. In Costco for some reason today I felt like the world had color again. I was just happy, not because of my year-long goal, but because I was happy.
R – 3 breaths
E – I am worried about my interview tomorrow, especially because I’ve never failed an interview before and so I’m worried about breaking that streak. But also think about that poem you set your bio to:
Never regret thy fall,
O Icarus of the fearless flight,
For the greatest tragedy of them all,
Is never to feel the burning light.
It is better to have tried and failed rather than never try at all.
S – Give it your all, and either way you will have been proud. Either the pressure is gone from failing, or you get a position at amazon lol.
T – Tomorrow morning prepare a bit more, and then get a good nights rest tonight.
from Tales From The Wrong Side Of Sanity
Yeah, so today I started the “couch to 5 km”. So some stats. I'm north of 50 and my BMI has been prefixed by “morbidly” for at least 15 years. And I haven't “gone for a jog” since my late 20's, which perhaps not coincidentally was when I left an employment which had a fitness testing component. I also moved into “family life” around that time where I moved away from team sports midweek and on weekends because I had “other duties”.
But I'm actually in slightly better nick than the statistics and your imagination might suggest. And yes, I know everyone thinks that. I was in properly terrible nick for years, but over the last 6 to 8 years I've been making a series of micro adjustments. Tweaking little things looking to live a bit healthier but without having to rely on willpower to get the job done, because that road will always lead to failure for me. If I'm hungry upon getting home from the salt mines, then unless I've got a super easy option right in front of me I'm internetting up a pizza and six pack. And then I'm not moving from the couch until bedtime.
As well as the eating micro tweaks, I've also been leaning into the move more area as well. Trying to incorporate more and more walking into my daily routine. And working on my core so I could manage more than 100 meters without debilitating back pain.
It wasn't that long ago when I completed my first 10,000 step walk. Then 11,000, then 13,000, etc. During a lockdown, I attempted to see how far I could go before I emptied the tank and got did about 20km, but I was cooked well and truly before I got home and cramping in all sorts of weird place, like the side of my knee(ish). From there, I settled into semi-regular 15km walks whilst trying to clear 10,000 steps on as many days as possible without being a bore about it.
That was my history coming in. I knew my legs could carry me OK and my core would mostly keep up. Even as a youngster I was never an aerobic beast. Very fast over short distances and explosive, but jogging for distance was never my go. I was very worried about air and ticker, but something kept telling me the time was right to start. Last week I bought a cheap Chinese health band and expensive Vietnamese running shoes.
Though the week I was comparing plans – starting with the original NHS plan (Which many state starts off too hard for some (AKA Fatties) beginners. I was very much in this camp), a softer starting 12 week plan and another 12 week plan for over 50's. NHS week 1 was 6 reps of 1:00 run then 1:30 walk. I thought that was well beyond me. One over 50 plan said 5 reps of 0:30 run then 2:30 walk and another said 0:20 run with the same. I thought these were more inline with my capabilities.
I built my plan, conscious of not going too hard and committed to today being the day. I was pretty apprehensive last night. I could feel my limbic system starting to trigger 'flu like symptoms which is a stunt it pulls when confronted by the threat of exercise, but it's gone to that well too many times and now I'm a wakeup to it.
This morning I walked to a track I was familiar with. One I've walked many times before and warmed up. I had the above numbers firmly in mind, but in the back of my mind I kept thinking about those 15km walks. Surely they lift me beyond the average 50 something couch potato? Despite the 40% bodyfat? Lets think about that NHS week 1 and just see how we go?
What I ended up managing was 6 repetitions of 1:00 run and 3:00 walk.
I was pretty happy with that. I've pulled up OK (it was a few hours ago) and if anything felt like I was holding back and consciously trying to go slow. My cheap Chinese health band told me my heart rate got to 105. By the time I walked back home I had been gone for about an hour and covered 7,000 steps. Only started to get lactic acid near the end of each minute and that and any blowing was completely gone before I started the next minute section. I was really worried about how “puffed” I would be running even 0:20 or 0:30 so this came as a pleasant surprise.
We'll see how sore I am in the morning. Hopefully not too bad, but I've well practised a nice walk to work out any soreness. And then we back up on Sunday.
Overall, could've gone a lot, lot worse. Better than the statistics suggested.
from headchecks
You feel comfortable for the first time in weeks. You may express yourself. You may say what’s on your mind.
It’s a false sense of security. The owner is watching. The manager is fuming.
He was treated unfairly. You sympathized with him. You’ve brought disgust unto yourself. You’ve chosen the wrong side.
Your mistake, your fault.
from the team trauma
FEB 28, 2003, 8:47 PM San Francisco, California
A goalie’s crease is not supposed to be painted red. It’s supposed to be blue, of course. The Blades goalie seems perplexed at the recent development.
“Fuck!” A voice shouts, panicked. A defenseman. Blueliners are always shouting so much. He throws off his gloves, presses his hands over the goalie’s, firm. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.”
The Blades are wearing their alternate jerseys tonight. Black with red, reminiscent of the Golden Gate in the evening, the dark stains like clouds ripping the sky apart.
“Just—just hang on, okay? Skate with me. We need you off the ice.” He’s panicking, his hands covered in blood, voice hoarse from screaming for medics. “Stay with me. Hang on. Please.”
He leaves behind a long red cut in the ice as he skates towards the exit. Steel is unforgiving.
“Please don’t…” He begs, his hands shaking. Blood is still pouring through between his fingers.
“I’ll be okay.” The goalie reassures him quietly, before collapsing in his arms.
from Learning German
Here are 50 words and phrases you might find useful if you're invited to a dinner:
Einladung – Invitation
Gastgeber – Host
Gast – Guest
Tisch – Table
Platz – Seat
Serviette – Napkin
Besteck – Cutlery
Gabel – Fork
Messer – Knife
Löffel – Spoon
– “Gibt es einen Löffel für die Suppe?” (Is there a spoon for the soup?)
Teller – Plate
– “Wo kann ich meinen Teller abstellen?” (Where can I place my plate?)
Gläser – Glasses
– “Können wir die Gläser auffüllen?” (Can we refill the glasses?)
Getränke – Drinks
– “Welche Getränke stehen zur Auswahl?” (What drinks are available?)
Wein – Wine
– “Kannst du mir bitte etwas Wein einschenken?” (Can you please pour me some wine?)
Bier – Beer
– “Hast du auch ein kühles Bier?” (Do you have a cold beer as well?)
Wasser – Water
– “Kann ich bitte ein Glas Wasser haben?” (Can I please have a glass of water?)
Saft – Juice
– “Gibt es auch Saft als Alternative?” (Is there juice available as an alternative?)
Vorspeise – Appetizer
– “Was ist die Vorspeise?” (What is the appetizer?)
Hauptgericht – Main course
– “Was ist das Hauptgericht für heute Abend?” (What is the main course for tonight?)
Beilage – Side dish
– “Gibt es eine spezielle Beilage zum Hauptgericht?” (Is there a specific side dish for the main course?)
Salat – Salad
– “Kann ich bitte etwas Salat haben?” (Can I please have some salad?)
Suppe – Soup
– “Gibt es eine vegetarische Suppe?” (Is there a vegetarian soup?)
Fleisch – Meat
– “Ich esse kein Fleisch. Gibt es eine vegetarische Option?” (I don't eat meat. Is there a vegetarian option?)
Fisch – Fish
– “Ist der Fisch frisch?” (Is the fish fresh?)
Vegetarisch – Vegetarian
– “Ich hätte gerne etwas Vegetarisches, bitte.” (I would like something vegetarian, please.)
Nachtisch – Dessert
– “Was gibt es als Nachtisch?” (What is for dessert?)
Kuchen – Cake
– “Ich liebe Kuchen! Welcher ist dein Favorit?” (I love cake! Which one is your favorite?)
Eis – Ice cream
– “Kann ich bitte eine Kugel Eis haben?” (Can I please have a scoop of ice cream?)
Kaffee – Coffee
– “Gibt es nach dem Essen auch Kaffee?” (Is there coffee after the meal?)
Tee – Tea
– “Hast du auch Tee zur Auswahl?” (Do you have tea as well?)
Gespräche – Conversations
– “Ich freue mich auf angenehme Gespräche.” (I'm looking forward to pleasant conversations.)
Tischmanieren – Table manners
– “Ich achte immer auf gute Tischmanieren.” (I always pay attention to good table manners.)
Dankbarkeit – Gratitude
– “Ich bin dankbar für diese Einladung.” (I am grateful for this invitation.)
Kompliment – Compliment
– “Das Essen sieht fantastisch aus. Ein Kompliment an den Koch!” (The food looks fantastic. A compliment to the chef!)
Unterhaltung – Conversation
– “Ich freue mich auf interessante Unterhaltungen heute Abend.” (I'm looking forward to engaging conversations tonight.)
Höflichkeit – Politeness
– “Es ist wichtig, mit Höflichkeit und Respekt miteinander umzugehen.” (It is important to treat each other with politeness and respect.)
Dankeschön – Thank you
– “Vielen Dank für die Einladung und die Gastfreundschaft.” (Thank you very much for the invitation and hospitality.)
Geselligkeit – Sociability
– “Ich genieße die Geselligkeit bei gemeinsamen Abendessen.” (I enjoy the sociability of shared dinners.)
Prost! – Cheers!
– “Prost! Auf einen wunderbaren Abend.” (Cheers! To a wonderful evening.)
Freundschaft – Friendship
– “Ein gemeinsames Abendessen stärkt die Freundschaft.” (A shared dinner strengthens friendship.)
Respekt – Respect
– “Respektieren wir die unterschiedlichen Essgewohnheiten und Vorlieben.” (Let's respect different eating habits and preferences.)
Genießen – Enjoy
– “Lass uns das Essen und die Gesellschaft genießen.” (Let's enjoy the food and the company.)
Appetit – Appetite
– “Ich habe einen großen Appetit. Das Essen sieht köstlich aus.” (I have a big appetite. The food looks delicious.)
Sättigung – Satiation
– “Ich bin satt und zufrieden nach diesem köstlichen Essen.” (I am full and satisfied after this delicious meal.)
Lächeln – Smile
– “Ein Lächeln kann die Atmosphäre eines Abendessens aufhellen.” (A smile can brighten up the atmosphere of a dinner.)
Gastfreundschaft – Hospitality
– “Danke für deine herzliche Gastfreundschaft.” (Thank you for your warm hospitality.)
Hingabe – Devotion
– “Ich schätze deine Hingabe beim Zubereiten des Essens.” (I appreciate your devotion in preparing the meal.)
Wertschätzung – Appreciation
– “Ich möchte meine Wertschätzung für diese köstliche Mahlzeit ausdrücken.” (I want to express my appreciation for this delicious meal.)
Geschenk – Gift
– “Ich habe ein kleines Geschenk für dich als Dankeschön.” (I have a small gift for you as a token of appreciation.)
Gastfreundschaft – Welcome
– “Danke für das herzliche Willkommen in deinem Zuhause.” (Thank you for the warm welcome to your home.)
from Learning German
Her are 50 useful words and phrases you might need when buying a train ticket, along with simple situations and their translations:
Bahnhof – Train station
Fahrkarte – Ticket
Einfache Fahrt – One-way ticket
Hin- und Rückfahrt – Round-trip ticket
Erste Klasse – First class
Zweite Klasse – Second class
Abfahrt – Departure
Ankunft – Arrival
Bahnsteig – Platform
Verspätung – Delay
- "Entschuldigung, aber mein Zug hat eine Verspätung." (Excuse me, but my train is delayed.)
Fahrplan – Timetable
- "Können Sie mir bitte den Fahrplan für die Strecke nach Köln geben?" (Can you please give me the timetable for the route to Cologne?)
Umsteigen – Change trains
- "Muss ich in Frankfurt umsteigen, um nach Berlin zu gelangen?" (Do I have to change trains in Frankfurt to get to Berlin?)
Reservierung – Reservation
- "Ich hätte gerne eine Reservierung für den Schnellzug." (I would like to make a reservation for the express train.)
Gepäck – Luggage
- "Wie viele Gepäckstücke darf ich mitnehmen?" (How many pieces of luggage am I allowed to bring?)
Fensterplatz – Window seat
- "Ich hätte gerne einen Fensterplatz, bitte." (I would like a window seat, please.)
Gangplatz – Aisle seat
- "Gibt es noch einen Gangplatz frei?" (Is there an available aisle seat?)
Fahrkartenautomat – Ticket machine
- "Kann ich meine Fahrkarte am Fahrkartenautomaten kaufen?" (Can I buy my ticket at the ticket machine?)
Barzahlung – Cash payment
- "Akzeptieren Sie Barzahlung?" (Do you accept cash payment?)
Kreditkarte – Credit card
- "Kann ich mit meiner Kreditkarte bezahlen?" (Can I pay with my credit card?)
Entwerter – Ticket validator
- "Vergessen Sie nicht, Ihr Ticket im Entwerter zu entwerten." (Don't forget to validate your ticket in the ticket validator.)
Gültigkeit – Validity
- "Wie lange ist mein Ticket gültig?" (How long is my ticket valid for?)
BahnCard – Railcard
- "Ich habe eine BahnCard. Gilt sie auch für diese Strecke?" (I have a railcard. Does it apply to this route as well?)
Kinderermäßigung – Child discount
- "Gibt es eine Kinderermäßigung für meine Tochter?" (Is there a child discount for my daughter?)
Erwachsener – Adult
- "Ich möchte eine Fahrkarte für einen Erwachsenen kaufen." (I would like to buy a ticket for an adult.)
Kind – Child
- "Wie viel kostet eine Fahrkarte für ein Kind?" (How much does a ticket for a child cost?)
Senioren – Seniors
- "Gibt es Ermäßigungen für Senioren?" (Are there discounts for seniors?)
Ermäßigung – Discount
- "Gibt es eine Ermäßigung für Studenten?" (Is there a discount for students?)
Ausweis – ID
- "Muss ich meinen Ausweis vorzeigen?" (Do I need to show my IDbefore I can buy a ticket?)
Buchungsnummer – Booking reference
- "Ich habe eine Buchungsnummer für meine Reservierung." (I have a booking reference for my reservation.)
Stornierung – Cancellation
- "Kann ich meine Fahrkarte stornieren?" (Can I cancel my ticket?)
Erstattung – Refund
- "Erhalte ich eine Erstattung, wenn ich meine Fahrkarte storniere?" (Will I receive a refund if I cancel my ticket?)
Zugbindung – Train-specific ticket
- "Ist meine Fahrkarte an einen bestimmten Zug gebunden?" (Is my ticket specific to a particular train?)
Fahrkartenkontrolle – Ticket inspection
- "Bitte halten Sie Ihre Fahrkarte für die Fahrkartenkontrolle bereit." (Please have your ticket ready for inspection.)
Bahncard 25 – Railcard 25
- "Kann ich mit einer Bahncard 25 eine Ermäßigung erhalten?" (Can I get a discount with a Railcard 25?)
Umstiegszeit – Transfer time
- "Wie viel Zeit habe ich für den Umstieg?" (How much time do I have for the transfer?)
Bahnsteigwechsel – Platform change
- "Achten Sie auf den Bahnsteigwechsel für Ihren Anschlusszug." (Pay attention to the platform change for your connecting train.)
Abfahrtszeit – Departure time
- "Wann ist die Abfahrtszeit des Zuges nach Hamburg?" (What is the departure time of the train to Hamburg?)
Ankunftszeit – Arrival time
- "Wann ist die Ankunftszeit in Köln?" (What is the arrival time in Cologne?)
Vorverkauf – Advance purchase
- "Kann ich meine Fahrkarte im Vorverkauf kaufen?" (Can I buy my ticket in advance?)
Nachtzug – Night train
- "Gibt es einen Nachtzug nach München?" (Is there a night train to Munich?)
Platzreservierung – Seat reservation
- "Kann ich einen Sitzplatz reservieren?" (Can I reserve a seat?)
Wagen – Carriage
- "In welchem Wagen befindet sich mein Sitzplatz?" (In which carriage is my seat located?)
Zugbegleiter – Train conductor
- "Kann ich meine Fahrkarte dem Zugbegleiter zeigen?" (Can I show my ticket to the train conductor?)
Nicht rauchen – No smoking
- "Darf man im Zug rauchen?" (Is smoking allowed on the train?)
Raucherabteil – Smoking compartment
- "Gibt es ein Raucherabteil in diesem Zug?" (Is there a smoking compartment on this train?)
Bahnsteigsperre – Platform barrier
- "Vergessen Sie nicht, Ihre Fahrkarte an der Bahnsteigsperre zu entwerten." (Don't forget to validate your ticket at the platform barrier.)
Fahrgast – Passenger
- "Ich bin ein Fahrgast mit einer Reservierung." (I am a passenger with a reservation.)
Ansage – Announcement
- "Können Sie die Ansagen im Zug deutlicher machen?" (Can you make the announcements on the train clearer?)
Zugausfall – Train cancellation
- "Entschuldigung, aber mein Zug wurde abgesagt." (Excuse me, but my train has been canceled.)
Wartebereich – Waiting area
- "Wo ist der Wartebereich für den Zug nach Dortmund?" (Where is the waiting area for the train to Dortmund?)
from Learning German
In German, “der,” “die,” “das,” and “dem” are articles used to indicate the gender and case of a noun.
Bu to understand this better let’s first understand the use of nominative and dative cases in German
Nominative Case:
Examples:
Now, let's move on to the dative case. The dative case is used to indicate the indirect object of a sentence, which is the person or thing that is indirectly affected by the action.
Dative Case:
Examples:
Understanding the cases is important in German grammar, as they affect the articles, adjectives, and pronouns used with the nouns
So how do we use der, dem , die and das with this basic understanding?
“Der” is used with masculine nouns in the nominative case:
“Die” is used with feminine nouns in the nominative case:
“Das” is used with neuter nouns in the nominative case:
“Dem” is used with masculine and neuter nouns in the dative case:
from Roscoe's Story
Prayers, etc.: • 05:00 – Prayer to St. Michael the Archangel • 06:00 – the Angelus • 07:15 – Praying the Joyful Mysteries of the Holy Rosary, followed by The Memorare • 08:45 – From the Traditional Latin Mass for 27 March 2024 Collect: “O God, from Whom Judas received the punishment of his guilt, and the thief the reward of his confession: grant unto us the full fruit of Thy clemency; that even as in His Passion our Lord Jesus Christ gave to each retribution according to his merits, so having cleared away our former guilt, He may bestow on us the grace of His Resurrection.” • 10:00 – Opus Dei and the Knights of Columbus: Anatomy of a Takeover – Part Three • 12:00 – the Angelus • 18:00 – the Angelus • 19:30 – The hour of Compline for tonight according to the Traditional Pre-Vatican II Divine Office, followed by Fr. Chad Rippberger's Prayer of Command to protect my family, my sons, my daughter and her family, my granddaughters and their families, my great grandchildren, and everyone for whom I have responsibility from any demonic activity. – And that followed by the Thursday Prayers of the Association of the Auxilium Christianorum.
Health Metrics: • bw= 218.50 lbs. • bp= 122/69 (80)
Diet: • 06:00 – ½ pb&j sandwich, 1 banana • 08:30 – cole slaw • 11:15 – fried chicken • 14:30 – biscuit & butter, sausage, scrambled eggs, pan cakes & syrup, filipino vegetables, rice pudding dessert • 17:30 – 1 orange
Chores, etc.: • 05:00 – listen to local news talk radio • 06:30 – monitor bank accounts activity • 08:00 – watching Real America's Voice • 09:00 – Bannon's War Room • 11:00 – watching old eps. of Wheel of Fortune • 14:30 – eat lunch at home with Sylvia • 15:00 – tune in to the Astros vs Yankees game • 18:00 – now tuned in to the Rangers vs Cubs game
Chess: • 07:00 – moved in all pending server-based CC games • 17:15 – sent moves in pending email CC games
posted Thursday 28/Mar/2024 ~20:00 #DLMAR2024
from MemeStocking
CA-based Air Lease Corporation is primarily involved in purchasing commercial aircraft directly from the manufacturers, leasing the same to its airline customers across the globe. Noteworthy manufacturers that the company works with are Bping and Airbus.
Besides leasing, the company sells planes to third parties such as other leasing companies, financial services and corporate airline entities. It also provides investors and owners with fleet management services and charges a management fee in return. The company faces competition from aircraft manufacturers, banks, financial institutions, other leasing companies, aircraft brokers and airlines.
Fundamental numbers:
Price to Earnings:
Profit Margin
Assets to Liabilities
Cash Flow
Analyst forecast:
Projected Sales and EPS growth
Earnings and growth history
Consensus estimates
from chaosorc
Logan opened the door, Jeff
They hugged and he pulled him in, arm on his shoulder.
Don't bother with the shoes, Carl is on his way
No shot, what about food
I got that covered, Paul even chipped in
Paul was standing in his room with the door open, waived two fingers, was doing something with a sneaker.
How you been?
Don't want to get too far into it without the whole crew here.
Got it
They sat on the couch and Logan handed him a controller.
•
A knock at the door.
One minute please
Carl pounded the door, come on dude, he tried the handle and it was open.
Logan and Jeff were laughing about the door, welcome dude.
They were playing a shooting video game on the big television in the corner.
The fuck, guys, I didn't know this was a gamer party
He said the word party in two words, par tay.
•
Once they got wiped out in the game they moved to the island in the kitchen, seated on bar stools. Logan sat closest to the kitchen so he could ration out the beers.
Jeff was just about to explain his love life
The fuck I am, I asked you first
Carl grinned, waiting for his turn to tell them about Vanessa.
Logan handed out the beers and Carl immediately began drinking his.
Paul, you coming out to hear about current events
No, got to go to the mall
The fuck is at the mall
Carl and Jeff looked at eachother and made strange faces.
I'm turning in applications today don't you remember
Fuck no
They laughed.
Break a leg, Carl lifted his beer to toast but no one else did, he drank anyway.
Good luck, Pauly
Paul closed and locked the front door.
I feel so safe
Jeff, you can stop holding me now the door is locked
Alright where were we
I don't know man I try to keep them lined up. They're all fucked up. I mean, everyone in this generation is. And they all do the same thing.
Smoke, suck, fuck, bail?
Something like that, Logan looked irritated that Carl put it so crass. His beer bottle was empty.
Meghan opened the door, the guys were sitting there, Jeff had the sad frog face.
What's up fuckers
Who invited you
I heard it was a convention of the pig fuckers and decided to pick up a badge and visit the retailers, who invited you
Paul, they all started calling his name.
He left remember
Oh yeah
Fucking idiots. Oh hey you're drinking Monte Alban
Is that what this is, Carl took another shot of the yellow liquor
Yeah the worm is in the fridge
Logan sat up straight.
We haven't had yellow worm there before
Yellow worm in the 'frigerator
You guys are fucking tossed
No, we are just happy to see you
She opened the refrigerator and looked for something to eat, when she didn't find it she went to the cupboard and moved the plastic containers of flour and oatmeal out of the way.
What's going on
Are you going to cook
She laughed and pulled out a bottle of vodka.
No, I'm gonna peel
She started working at the label with her thumbnail.
Meghan have I ever told you I love you
Yeah, Meghan, you're my best friend
They turned to face her, Logan stood up, want a shot glass
Or four
She looked at Carl with that predatory stare, a grin spreading across her mouth, he sat back down.
She turned her gaze to Jeff and he froze.
Logan, your friends are pussies.