from Sienna Eggler

My last post was written when I was feeling down, but today was much better in comparison. I chalk that up to several things, like a sudden rush of muse for a few of my stories, and my autism diagnosis interview. I already knew I was autistic, and never would’ve gotten beyond the screening process if I wasn’t. But it was still very affirming to actually hear it said, and by someone who’s autistic herself and specializes in the subject.

There was a lot to process, so I didn’t get to take notes as much as I would’ve, but a few things stuck out. Like her pointing out my intense dislike for small talk but desire for deeper conversation. Autistic people are mistakenly assumed to be lacking in empathy, when we simply show it in different ways. I actually tested high in terms of empathy, which surprised me, but made sense when the doctor provided some clarification.

It’s the same with how we use words. One of my test results noted my levels of flexibility (spoiler alert, it’s pretty low), which could be a con in many situations. For me and others like me, it just means we tend to focus more on other aspects and like routine.

I’m still unpacking a lot of this and waiting on my official diagnosis and documents. I have to look into something called DNRS, which is supposedly helpful for overthinkers (relevant to recent events).

The one thing I want a second opinion on is my ADHD. I definitely feel the symptoms of that, and it runs on both sides of my family. My dad was diagnosed two years ago and suspects I have the inattentive version.

Anyway, I’ve been itching to start this side story I outlined over the weekend. I managed to write out half a chapter yesterday evening, but that was from my phone…not the ideal device for writing. I’m also debating on uploading more stories onto Kindle Vella. This side story takes place after Fluid Bonding, so I can’t exactly publish it at the same time, but I do have a sci-fi story in mind.

So now I have too many distractions to feel down about the thing that tripped me up over the weekend. At least until things slow down, haha.

#autism #journal #writing

 
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