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from Duaynekalade Parnell Bey

ready to die?bask22 if you were to go today

how many accomplishments have you made?

are you proud of what you've done?

and were there lives that you've affected?

are you proud of whom you've touched?

only you can answer these questions

only you can

you ready to die?

[chapter-1] leaning against a tombstone

with no one around

grass blows from the breeze

blowing grass from your mouth

weeds choke out the vegetation

that’s all about

willow trees hang low

like the locks on Bob’s scalp

heart palpitations increase

as the day grows old

stone blocks in the earth

now rep what used to hold a soul

now bones rot in a plot

until its soil in a box

it’s funny how life can be explained

from the words on a rock

[chapter-2] where does a person go

after they leave their shell cell?

ancient tales tell stories that stand by themselves

many men have fallen victim to exaggerations of the afterlife

so they try to walk the straight and narrow

they try to live longer than their own bone marrow

just so they can play a harp and

shoot-off a few arrows

[chapter-3] if you were to go today

how many accomplishments have you made?

are you proud of what you've done?

and were there lives that you've affected?

are you proud of whom you've touched?

only you can answer these questions only you can

you ready to die?

[chapter-4] how long will the pain last

before death comes knocking?

whether injured from a bomb blast

or a razor piercing your epiglottis

it’s hard to realize and

face the face of death

it’s hard to conceptualize

the time of your last breath

[chapter-4] how would you like to go?

in your sleep?

there’s a 1% chance

that that’s how death is going to creep

[chapter-5] most of us will die slow

we were born to die

most will suffer before they go

we’ll have time to cry

and cry and weep

and mourn our own existence

then sigh in defeat

as our bodies

put up that last resistance

[epilogue] if you were to go today

how many accomplishments have you made?

are you proud of what you've done?

and were there lives that you've affected?

are you proud of whom you've touched?

only you can answer these questions only you can

you ready to die?

Copyright © 2012, Duaynekalade Parnell Bey, All rights reserved


from Positive Thoughts

I've been trying to write a sample script to submit and I'm not entirely sure what to write. All last night I was distracted and watching this new show called The Rain. I'm almost done with the season so I guess I like it. Available on Netflix if you want to watch it too!

It's about people dying in the rain. There's some virus that causes people to die instantly when they come into contact with it.


from Γλαρόλυκοι

Το είχαν αποφασίσει, έπρεπε να τον σκοτώσουν.

Το συζητούσαν καιρό τώρα, το ανέλυαν, το οργάνωναν, ζύγιζαν όλες τις εκδοχές και τις πιθανότητες. Κατέληξαν στ’ ότι έπρεπε να γίνει μια κι έξω.

Δεν θα ήταν εύκολο, αλλά έπρεπε να γίνει, δεν υπήρχε πια χώρος γι' αυτόν στον κόσμο τους. Έπρεπε να απομακρυνθεί.

“Θα το κάνω εγώ” – είπε ο άντρας, ξεφυσώντας βαριά στο τέλος της πρότασης.

“Όχι, εγώ θα το κάνω, εγώ θα πάρω την ευθύνη” – είπε η γυναίκα με τρεμάμενη φωνή και μια υποψία μετάνοιας.

“Δεν έχεις το σθένος να το κάνεις, δεν ήσουν ποτέ αρκετά δυνατή, θα το κάνω να τελειώνουμε.”

“Θα το κάνουμε μαζί. Στο κάτω-κάτω, φταίμε κι οι δύο για ό,τι έγινε και για ό,τι θα γίνει. Θα μοιραστούμε το βάρος της επιλογής μας.”

“Εντάξει λοιπόν, ας είναι! Μόνο μη δειλιάσεις, μην του χαριστείς. Όχι αυτή τη φορά.”

“Όχι αυτή τη φορά” – επανέλαβε και κούνησε συγκαταβατικά το κεφάλι της.

Ο άντρας πήρε μια βαθιά ανάσα και δήλωσε αποφασιστικά: “Πάμε!”

Ανέβηκαν τη σκάλα με γοργά μα αθόρυβα βήματα. Στάθηκαν για μια στιγμή έξω απ' την πόρτα και μέτρησαν τις δεύτερες σκέψεις τους. Κοιτάχτηκαν στα μάτια, έγνεψαν καταφατικά ο ένας στον άλλο και μπήκαν με φόρα στο δωμάτιο.

Πρώτη χτύπησε η μητέρα. Ακολούθησε ο πατέρας. Ο έφηβος επαναστάτης πέθαινε για να ζήσει ο μελλοντικός υποτακτικός, ο συμβιβασμένος πολίτης, ο υπάκουος εργάτης, ο απαθής γείτονας, ο αδιάφορος φίλος, ο ανέραστος σύζυγος, ο ακίνδυνος οικογενειάρχης, ο πνιγμένος δανειολήπτης, ο ταλαιπωρημένος συνταξιούχος, ο μετανιωμένος για όλα ετοιμοθάνατος.

Κι η μικρή του αδερφή έκλαιγε στο διπλανό δωμάτιο ακούγοντας το φονικό, αντιλαμβανόμενη το δυσοίωνο μέλλον της.

Διαβάστε περισσότερα...

from undeleted blog

No Smartphone

I currently have a smartphone. It is an awful Kyocera that I bought for $35 from Wal-Mart and it has surprisingly been the most reliable phone I have used in the better part of a decade. I have had it for two years and though I was using a BlackBerry Classic as well during that time (and an iPhone 6 for a short while after that), for the most part I have stuck to the Kyocera.

As of next month that changes. I am buying the Nokia 3310 3G (2017) and that is going to be the only phone I use. The reason I am buying this particular feature-phone (also known as a “dumb phone”) is because it A) has a SIM card so I do not have to change my phone number, and B) it has 3G capabilities so I can tether it to my Raspberry Pi (I read an instructable on how you can do it).

Another reason I am switching to a feature-phone is: I simply do not need a smartphone. For anything. Everything I do on a day to day basis can and will be done on a desktop, and many of the “smart” features that people use on a smartphone I do not take advantage of. I do not take pictures (almost ever), I do not use Twitter or write blog posts when I am out in public or around friends/family, I do not use most of social media, and I don't even have e-mail or a Google account, or Apple account, or Windows account, or BlackBerry I.D. So...why be locked-down to an over-priced “smart” device when everything that actually needs to be done can be done in a proper way on a proper desktop?


There will be more on this subject after I get the phone. Stay tuned.


from undeleted blog

damn. sleep much?

I just had a hell of a nap. With nothing else happening on my Friday night, i figured: “why the fuck not”? Tomorrow will be more eventful as i am heading out to the 'rents for a little bit for laundry & to probably help out around the house a little bit, etc etc. Will try to keep myself occupied.

I am going to make some semi-stale coffee & Tweet. This is what i am going to do.



I am a 15 year old girl and I am fucking depressed.

I feel numb, yet sad. I have this sick temper and burst out at least 4 times a week where I just curse at everyone and well..

For around 2 months ago I tried to kill myself.

The reason? I felt sooo fucking alone, even though i had friends. My mother is what really triggered me.

She always calls me shit like ''slut'' ''unworthy''. My mother fucking says ''I hope you get cancer sometime''. You know what the wierd shit is? I still love her so fucking deeply, because I know my mother is depressed. I guess depression really infectious, huh.

I would much rather have been beaten black and blue than hearing those words.

I don't want to give you pictures of my attempt, I can just say I took pills – around 50 or so. Guess that wasn't enough, huh?

I tried telling my mom I needed to see a therapist, but the woman just laughed it off.

Jesus I don't even know why I wrote this. fuck this


from Positive Thoughts

Soo.. I got a call from my doctor today. I was kind of nervous because you know what people say. “If the doctor calls you back after a test it's positive.” The saying holds true because I got the news that I have an STD. I was feeling depressed because my partner was freaking out. After talking on the phone with my lover I felt better. The thing is that it's curable so there's no reason to feel upset but I did. I took an antibiotic for it today.

We're not sure who's fault is it because before we dated we had sex with other people without a condom. (There's a story about that too.) I never got a message from my previous partners that they caught something and I didn't have any symptoms. When my lover looked it up I was informed that if it's left untreated for too long it can result in infertility for me.

I'm currently listening to “One” by Ed Sheeran and it's making me want to cry. We've been dating for 3 years already and I have no idea how long it's been because I never got STD tested until a couple days ago. The only thing I'm waiting for is for my doctor to let me know when I have another appointment because that will determine if the STD is gone after the antibiotic. I know I shouldn't think of bad scenarios but I can't help but think about what would happen if they did some more testing and told me I can't have kids. We'll see when that day comes I guess.


from undeleted blog

look! a blog on the blog from where i blog!

i guess i'm sticking to because i am sick of Telegraph and the cross-posting to Twitter being....horrible (i have to do it manually! Bleh!) Besides i have a shitload of domains registered and i wanna put at least ONE of them to good use (here, w/

Anyhoo, (fuck, that's an annoying thing to say, isn't it? I'll stop that now). I am stuck inside for the day because it is pouring walls of rain outside and i can't go anywhere otherwise i would walk over to the grocery store & buy a pop (still gonna happen as soon as the rain stops).

I need some cigarettes, too :/


from The Du Mu Tu Collection

holographic:holographicbyDuMuTu [part-A:] beyond the sea of darkness

and ​though the fog

wading through the murky waters

of your mental

you’ve searched for the home which you haven't entered

since before your fall

all you know is right now you don't belong with the ?

who seem to be everywhere

inside you feel that it's wrong

that you’ve been forced out of your square

and into this squalor called Babylon


dysfunction is the norm

hate is the hub

ignorance is god

and all the hymns are bliss

reality is gone

everything is holographic

everything is false

[part-B:] metal mist in the clouds

nano bits in your manna

trying to cloud the eyeball above your brow

while the system clouds your logic with grammar

glamour can lead you towards a mental chasm

where echoes bounce off the walls of your skull

causing a rung to loosen on Jacob's Ladder

the serpent shed his skin and slid off

left your mouth full of froth ​ eyes wide shut

watching the blue sky fade to dark

as you escape this hologram

for the after naught

© 2014, Duaynekalade Parnell Bey, All rights reserved


from Positive Thoughts

Today went better than yesterday! Work wasn't too busy. I had interesting conversations with my coworkers and I'm about to start writing a script for this app called Moments. It's an interactive story app.

Those are my favorite kinds of apps. I love cliche romance stories. They didn't ask me to write a script for them but I want to do it to prove that I'm a good writer.

I'll update you guys later! (:


from Γλαρόλυκοι

Είμαι ένα status ξεχασμένο στην οθόνη σου Είμαι οι λέξεις που σκέφτεσαι, μα φοβάσαι να πεις Είμαι ψηφίο, είμαι παλμός, είμαι σήμα δια μέσου καλωδίων Είμαι άλλος ένας διαδικτυακός σταθμός που θα προσπεράσεις

Διαβάστε περισσότερα...

from Calvin Diaries

Ok, it begins with this. A really good looking someone suddenly contacted me out of the blue while pinging me on social media.

It was a call, out of the unknown, the voice was timid and shy. I didn't know who it was even when he said his name; as my app wasn't updating real time I guess.

We texted a little and he was asking for a collaboration between me and him, something out of the bounds of just friends, it was shocking and exciting at first only to end the conversation very abruptly.

Come late afternoon, no replies whatsoever.

I was weirded out and tried to contact via social media as a recourse, turns out in his online account “it wasn't him.” It was weird considering the fact that he contacted me with a name before he added me in social media.

Come a few days after talking, we got to converse about his looks and about the “fraud” who was trying to get him to collaborate with me. He denied the being the texter, I just shrugged it off and took it as a inquisitive challenge.

In the end he said yes, not confessing though, but he opted for it in a surprising manner.

And now we're just conversing continuously and it's exhilarating to meet someone new that looks so good.

The Male Physique

I've missed taking photos of my body with nothing on. I know it sounds vain, and maybe it is. But I've loved the male body in general, the strength it brings while the curvature portraying so much life and sensuality.

I would really love to take photos of another person instead to test out this mettle and to expand my portfolio. If only I could get models to do so without any hint of kink.

Absentee Admins

Currently our admin employees are going haywire and leaving out. It's a shame, loss and a prick to leave without proper transition — they're going out without due process and guess who's having problems? Us, people that need her for operations. What's horrible is that it was her own fault and her lack of transparency with her words. Ugh, now I'm doing her job for the mean time.


from Holocaust News

Shoah is a 1985 French documentary film about the Holocaust, directed by Claude Lanzmann. It’s over nine hours long and took eleven years to make. The film presents Lanzmann’s first-hand interviews with survivors, witnesses and perpetrators across 14 countries.

After watching “Shoah”, Roger Ebert wrote: “There is no proper response to this film. It is an enormous fact, a 550-minute howl of pain and anger in the face of genocide. It is one of the noblest films ever made.”

The BBC as part of its “Witness” podcast series interviewed Irena Steinfeldt, who worked with Lanzmann on the film. Steinfeld now serves as Director of the Department for the Righteous Among the Nations at Yad Vashem, Israel’s Holocaust museum in Jerusalem. This podcast contributes to the history of the making of this valuable documentary.

BBC Witness Podcast


from Positive Thoughts

Today I'm going to try to keep a positive mind. So far today is pretty good. I was still too depressed to pack a lunch and went straight to work but now that I'm here it's not so bad.

All day yesterday I was feeling really down. It was to the point I stayed inside all day, isolated myself, and didn't go to bible study. I can feel the Lord shaking his head in disappointment right now. Oh Lord, you already know I'll be there this Sunday! 😅



I hate myself for so many reasons but the main reason I hate myself is for not being able to be a proper human being. What the hell does that mean to be a proper person? Everyone is good in their own self isn't it?


from Duaynekalade Parnell Bey


as false light hovers


legions of stars

walk in hell


of the solarium

under skin sheath


of the heaven

inside their shell

© 2018, Duaynekalade Parnell Bey, All rights reserved


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