As we enter into this Lenten season, prayer is one of the disciplines that many Christians will focus on. This morning, I stumbled upon this prayer penned by Rafael Cardinal Merry Del Val (1865-1930), who served as the Secretary of State for Pope St. Pius X. There is nothing specifically Roman Catholic about it, nor is there any reason it cannot be prayed by any Christian, regardless of background. We would all do well to pray this litany slowly and thoughtfully.

Jesus, meek and humble of heart, hear me. From the desire of being esteemed, deliver me, Jesus. From the desire of being loved, deliver me, Jesus. From the desire of being extolled, deliver me, Jesus. From the desire of being honored, deliver me, Jesus. From the desire of being praised, deliver me, Jesus. From the desire of being preferred to others, deliver me, Jesus. From the desire of being consulted, deliver me, Jesus. From the desire of being approved, deliver me, Jesus. From the fear of being humiliated, deliver me, Jesus. From the fear of being despised, deliver me, Jesus. From the fear of suffering rebukes, deliver me, Jesus. From the fear of being calumniated, deliver me, Jesus. From the fear of being forgotten, deliver me, Jesus. From the fear of being ridiculed, deliver me, Jesus. From the fear of being wronged, deliver me, Jesus. From the fear of being suspected, deliver me, Jesus. That others may be loved more than I, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it. That others may be esteemed more than I, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it. That, in the opinion of the world, others may increase and I may decrease, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it. That others may be chosen and I set aside, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it. That others may be praised and I unnoticed, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it. That others may be preferred to me in everything, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it. That others may become holier than I, provided that I may become as holy as I should, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it. Amen.

Note: calumniated means maligned, slandered, or defamed

#Lent #prayers

On nights like this, I ache for your love, For a presence that stitches the cracks in my soul, For a heartbeat that feels like home, For a touch that reminds me I’m not alone

There comes a time in every life when we look back at something we said, something we failed to do, or a moment when someone needed us and we did not rise the way we hoped. These moments do not disappear quietly; they follow us through the years and resurface during quiet hours, reminding us of the ways we fell short, the promises we didn’t keep, or the expectations we could not meet. Every human being carries these memories, even if they try to bury them beneath busyness or maturity or spiritual language that pretends the past is irrelevant. The truth is that letting someone down carves its own kind of wound, not only in the heart of the person we disappointed but also in our own, because it challenges the image we hold of ourselves. We want to believe we are dependable, trustworthy, consistent, and honorable, yet when we fall, we are forced to face the uncomfortable distance between who we want to be and who we were in that moment. Instead of running from that discomfort, the life of faith calls us to slow down long enough to let God lift the weight of shame and replace it with something entirely different from the condemnation we expect.

It is easy to assume that failure disqualifies us. Perhaps it is because the world treats disappointment as a permanent stain, measuring us not by the whole of our character but by the worst of our moments. Yet God has never approached people through the narrow lens of their lowest point, and Scripture repeatedly shows that His redemptive nature has no interest in finalizing our story at the place where we stumbled. When we come face-to-face with the reality that we let someone down, what we are actually encountering is an invitation to allow God’s grace to rewrite what we believe about ourselves. The beauty of God’s heart is found in the way He steps into our failures without flinching, without recoiling, and without withdrawing His purpose. Instead, He meets us in the exact place where we feel most unworthy and transforms the meaning of the moment. What we see as disqualification, He often sees as the beginning of deeper humility, sharper discernment, and a renewed dependence on His strength instead of our own. He understands that human beings grow through imperfection far more than they grow through the illusion of having everything figured out.

We learn this truth from the stories of those who came before us. The Bible is filled with men and women who let others down, let themselves down, and even let God down, yet not one of those failures stopped God from completing the work He began in them. Peter denied Christ three times, not because he lacked devotion but because fear seized him at a moment he wasn’t prepared for. Moses lost his temper and struck the rock, revealing a weakness he had battled for years. David betrayed trust, failed morally, and wounded people who depended on him. These are not minor missteps; they are heart-shaking failures that would have ended their stories if God viewed them the way we often view ourselves after we disappoint someone. Yet despite all of it, God restored them, refined them, and used their brokenness as part of the testimony that shaped generations after them. Their failures did not end their purpose; their failures deepened their purpose. This is how God works, not by pretending the failure didn’t happen, but by stepping into it and drawing out something that could only be learned in the places where we fall.

What these stories remind us is that letting someone down is not the moment God walks away; it is the moment God draws near. When we feel the sting of regret, the weight of responsibility, or the quiet ache of wishing we could go back and redo a moment, we are standing on holy ground. Those feelings are not punishments; they are invitations. They remind us that our hearts are still tender, still capable of conviction, still capable of wanting to do right. God meets us there, not to crush us but to guide us toward growth. He takes our regret and turns it into insight. He takes our sorrow and turns it into compassion. He takes our embarrassment and turns it into humility. And humility is the soil in which our most significant spiritual development takes root. Without humility, we grow only in skill or knowledge. But with humility, we grow in character, in depth, and in likeness to Christ.

One of the greatest lies disappointment tries to plant in us is the belief that we are permanently defined by a single moment. Failure loves to exaggerate its own importance, whispering that the worst of what we did is the truth of who we are. Yet God never speaks this way. He does not frame our identity around one lapse in judgment or one season of weakness. Instead, He consistently reminds us that identity is rooted in who He is, not in what we failed to do. The life of faith is not the life of perfection; it is the life of transformation. Every moment we fall short becomes another place God can strengthen us, teach us, and lead us into something better. He is far more committed to our growth than He is offended by our mistakes. When we begin to internalize this, we stop hiding from God after we disappoint someone and begin running to Him, trusting that He sees the entire story and refuses to define us by one page of it.

Still, the process of healing after letting someone down is not simply an internal experience; it is also a relational one. Faith calls us to repair what was broken, not in an attempt to earn forgiveness or erase the past, but as an act of integrity. When we reach out to someone we disappointed, something powerful happens within us. We acknowledge our part honestly, we express genuine remorse, and we take ownership without excuses. This posture strengthens the soul because it teaches us accountability without self-condemnation. Taking responsibility is not the same as drowning in shame; one leads to growth while the other leads to paralysis. When we approach the person we hurt with sincerity and humility, we demonstrate the kind of maturity that God cultivates within those who walk closely with Him. Even if the other person is not ready to forgive, the act of stepping forward honors God because it reflects His heart—a heart that pursues reconciliation, seeks healing, and values truth spoken in love.

As we walk through the slow process of rebuilding trust, we discover that God uses this journey to refine our character in profound ways. The discomfort we feel becomes the classroom where God teaches us how to be more discerning, more patient, more thoughtful, and more intentional moving forward. Instead of letting disappointment define us, we allow it to shape us, which is an entirely different experience. When we offer our failures to God, they lose the power to shame us and instead gain the power to grow us. They become markers of the ways God has transformed us from who we were into who we are becoming. The more we realize this, the more courage we gain to face our mistakes rather than avoid them, because we see that God can bring something beautiful even from moments we would prefer to erase.

There is an undeniable tenderness in the way Jesus interacted with people who let others down. He did not minimize their actions, but He didn’t weaponize them either. He restores with clarity, not cruelty. When Peter denied Him, Jesus didn’t lecture him; He asked him three times, “Do you love Me?” because He wanted Peter to see that his calling was still intact. When the woman caught in adultery faced condemnation, Jesus met her with both truth and mercy, refusing to shame her while also calling her higher. These encounters teach us the heart of God toward those who fail: He does not humiliate; He heals. He does not discard; He rebuilds. He does not define us by our worst moment; He defines us by His ongoing work within us. And when we begin to see ourselves through that lens, we stop believing the lie that we are too broken to be used by God. Instead, we begin to understand that the places where we fell short are often the very places God uses to speak through us later.

There comes a turning point in the journey of anyone who has let someone down, and it usually arrives in the form of a quiet realization that God is not asking us to live our lives replaying our failures like a movie loop we cannot escape. Instead, He asks us to live forward, to step into the version of ourselves that these difficult experiences are shaping. Somewhere along the way, we begin to understand that God is far more interested in who we are becoming than in who we were at our lowest point. This shift matters enormously, because when we stop defining ourselves by our disappointment, we finally gain the courage to ask God the deeper questions: What do You want me to learn here? Who are You shaping me to become? How can this moment make me wiser, gentler, and more Christ-like? When these questions become the center of our reflection, failure is no longer a sentence—it becomes a seed, planted in soil where God intends to grow something new. That is why the people who have failed greatly sometimes become the most compassionate, the most understanding, and the most spiritually grounded, because they have learned firsthand what it means to depend on God in the places where they once relied only on themselves. They learn that strength is not born from perfection but from surrender.

Every disappointment carries two possible outcomes. It can either shrink your life by convincing you that you’re not worthy of trust or responsibility anymore, or it can expand your life by opening your eyes to the places where God is inviting you into deeper maturity. Our culture tends to celebrate people who never falter, but heaven celebrates people who grow after they fall, because growth requires humility, honesty, and the willingness to be reshaped by grace. When we let someone down, God does not simply patch the wound; He uproots the roots that caused the wound in the first place. He brings to the surface the impatience, distraction, pride, fear, or disorganization that contributed to the failure, not to shame us but to refine us so that the same mistake does not define our future. In this way, failure becomes a mirror, showing us the parts of our character that still need God’s touch. And the more willing we are to look into that mirror without flinching, the more powerfully God works in shaping the next version of us.

There is also an important truth we discover when we let someone down: we learn how desperately we need others, how deeply our connections matter, and how essential it is to build relationships on a foundation of honesty. When we are forced to acknowledge that our actions hurt someone, we begin to understand the sacred responsibility we have toward the people God places in our lives. Relationships are not background scenery; they are part of our calling. And when we take that seriously, we begin to approach people with greater gentleness, greater intentionality, and greater respect. Failing someone teaches us not only what we value but how we want to live going forward. It teaches us to slow down when we might rush, to speak thoughtfully when we might react impulsively, and to show up fully rather than halfway. These lessons are not small; they are transformative. God uses these experiences to shape us into people who reflect His heart more clearly in the way we treat others.

The restoration God brings after we let someone down is rarely a dramatic or sudden moment; it is more often a quiet transformation happening in the background of our days. It takes time to rebuild trust, especially with ourselves. We begin by choosing to be present where we were once distracted, to be reliable where we were once inconsistent, and to be accountable where we were once defensive. Slowly, we begin to notice that we are becoming the person we wished we had been in that painful moment. This is the grace of God at work—not only forgiving our past but reshaping our future. When God repairs the cracks in our character, He does not simply patch them; He strengthens them, turning them into places where light can shine through. Over time, the very failure that once filled us with regret becomes a part of our testimony, a reminder that God met us in our lowest places and led us into higher ground.

What is perhaps most healing is the realization that God wastes nothing—not our tears, not our regrets, and certainly not our failures. When we walk with Him long enough, we eventually look back at moments that once felt devastating and realize they became the turning points that shaped our spiritual identity. They made us more authentic, more grounded, more compassionate, and more reliant on God’s wisdom instead of our own. This transformation is not abstract or theoretical; it becomes evident in the way we speak, the way we lead, the way we apologize, the way we forgive, and the way we show up for others. The person we become through God’s refinement is always stronger than the person we were before the struggle, because that strength is no longer rooted in our own ability but in His absolute faithfulness.

If you have let someone down, it does not mean your character is flawed beyond repair. It means you have arrived at a crossroads where God is ready to deepen you, strengthen you, and reveal more of Himself to you. What you do next matters, not because you need to earn anyone’s approval, but because this is where God shapes the next chapter of your life. Lean into the discomfort. Take responsibility with humility. Seek reconciliation where possible. Give yourself permission to grow instead of reliving the failure endlessly. And most of all, trust that God is not done with you. He is still shaping you, still guiding you, still investing in you, and still committed to the person you are becoming. Your story is not held hostage by the moment you fell short. It is carried forward by the God who refuses to leave you where He found you.

Your friend, Douglas Vandergraph

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If the allegations now before the courts are accurate, the employment contract at the center of the Kwantlen Student Association’s latest lawsuit should alarm every student who pays into the organization.

According to court filings reported by The Runner, a student services manager position carried a base salary of $120,000, guaranteed four-per-cent annual increases, and a severance clause worth one year of salary even if terminated for cause and three years if terminated without cause. The agreement was reportedly negotiated with Executive Director Timothii Ragavan.

Let’s pause on that.

What kind of nonprofit writes contracts that pay a full year’s salary to someone fired for cause? Where, exactly, in the nonprofit or student-union world is three years of severance considered normal? These are not rhetorical flourishes, they are extremely serious governance questions that should be raised by the student membership.

Student unions are not venture-backed startups. They are custodians of mandatory student fees. Every dollar spent on executive compensation or litigation is a dollar that does not go to food banks, clubs, advocacy, or campus services.

And yet, according to the same reporting, the position in question was later reposted at a salary roughly 71 per cent lower than what had been paid previously. If the original compensation was necessary to “align with cost of living,” as similar justifications are often framed, what changed? Did the cost of living collapse overnight—or was the original salary simply indefensible?

The ethical dimension is difficult to ignore. Staff covered under collective agreements often fight for modest wage increases that barely keep pace with inflation. Meanwhile, management contracts allegedly guarantee raises, bonuses, and extraordinary severance protections. The disparity sends a clear message about whose labour is valued and whose is expendable.

Transparency is another glaring problem. Students only learn about executive compensation through court filings, leaks, or investigative reporting. Why? In practice, the KSA has been a publicly funded society in all but name, financed almost entirely by compulsory fees. Students should not have to wait for litigation to understand how their money is being spent.

There needs to be transparency rules to show exactly how much executives, the board, and management make without obfuscating or hiding among the staff budget line. Those need to be their own, separate, budget lines.

The current lawsuits also reveal a deeper governance culture. The KSA has declined to comment publicly on the proceedings, stating that matters are confidential until resolution. Yet confidentiality can easily become a shield—not merely for legal strategy, but for avoiding scrutiny altogether. When legal counsel is funded by the same students seeking answers, the optics are troubling.

Image: Plaintiff in the litigation against the Kwantlen Student Association, Yakshit Shetty.

There are also serious questions about management effectiveness and oversight. In his claim, Yakshit Shetty alleges he received little negative feedback and was dismissed in bad faith. That is one side of the dispute, and it will ultimately be tested in court. However, multiple individuals familiar with KSA operations have privately expressed a very different view, describing longstanding concerns about management performance that were allegedly raised but not acted upon. If those accounts are even partly accurate, it suggests a breakdown not only in supervision but in institutional accountability.

This is the paradox of the current situation: an organization claiming to act in good faith toward students appears to have tolerated governance practices that, at minimum, invite skepticism.

Beyond any single contract or lawsuit lies a larger structural issue. Student unions can become insulated ecosystems, where former executives return as consultants, where governance roles circulate within the same networks, and where institutional memory serves to preserve power rather than reform it. When oversight is weak and turnover among the student body is constant, accountability becomes optional.

That is precisely why transparency and restraint in compensation matter so much. Students graduate; contracts and precedents remain.

The KSA often speaks about representation, advocacy, and student welfare. Those words carry weight. But representation is not measured by press releases or mission statements—it is measured by how carefully an organization stewards the money entrusted to it.

Right now, many students are left with a simple, uncomfortable question:

If this is how the association negotiates, pays, and defends its own leadership, who, exactly, is being represented?

When Ottawa families begin researching autism support options, the conversation often focuses on credentials, therapy approaches, and waitlists. Location, however, is a factor that's easy to underestimate and one that has a real, measurable impact on whether therapy is sustainable over time.

For families living in Nepean, choosing support close to home isn't just about convenience. It influences how often your child attends, how well services integrate with school and community life, and how connected you feel to the support network around you.

The Practical Reality of Long Commutes

Autism therapy, particularly ABA-based intervention, is most effective when it's consistent. Many evidence-based programs recommend multiple sessions per week, sometimes daily. When services are located far from home, the logistical burden on families accumulates quickly:

1. Multiple cross-city drives per week
2. Disrupted nap schedules and meal routines
3. Fatigue for the child before and after sessions
4. Increased stress for parents managing siblings and work schedules
5. Higher transportation costs over the course of a program

Research from the Public Health Agency of Canada consistently highlights consistency of intervention as one of the strongest predictors of positive outcomes in autism support programs. When families can sustain attendance without enormous personal cost, children receive more of the intervention they need.

Community Context Shapes Therapy Outcomes

Beyond logistics, there's a clinical dimension to proximity. Effective autism support doesn't exist in isolation from a child's natural environment — their neighborhood, school, parks, and local routines are the spaces where skills need to generalize.

A provider familiar with Nepean's community local schools, recreational programs, the specific sensory environment of familiar places is better positioned to:

• Develop goals that reflect realistic daily life for your child
• Conduct community-based therapy in environments your child already encounters
• Coordinate directly with your child's school or daycare
• Understand the local service landscape and make appropriate referrals

Families accessing autism services Nepean providers locally often find that therapists can accompany children to community settings libraries, playgrounds, grocery stores where real-world skill practice happens in context.

Consistency Across Environments

Children with autism often learn skills in one setting but struggle to apply them in another, a challenge clinicians call generalization. One of the most effective ways to support generalization is to practice skills across multiple relevant environments, including natural community settings.

When your service provider is based nearby, it becomes much more feasible to:

• Hold some sessions at home, where daily routines occur
• Practice skills in the actual park or community center your family visits
• Coordinate with school staff during school hours
• Make quick check-in visits when a concern arises unexpectedly

This kind of environmental flexibility is harder to achieve when travel time is a significant barrier.

Family Sustainability Over the Long Term

Autism support is not a short-term intervention. Many families are in programs for years, sometimes through childhood into adolescence. The sustainability of a service arrangement matters enormously over that timeframe.

Families who choose local autism services Nepean providers often report:

• Higher overall session attendance rates
• Less caregiver burnout related to transportation logistics
• Greater ability to respond quickly when a concern or regression arises
• Stronger ongoing relationships with their child's therapy team

A parent who isn't exhausted from driving across the city is a more present and effective participant in their child's program, and parent involvement is one of the most powerful variables in therapy outcomes.

Building a Local Network of Support

Location also connects families to a broader community network. When your child's therapy team is embedded in the same community you live in, there are natural opportunities to:

• Connect with other local families navigating similar experiences
• Participate in community autism events and awareness initiatives
• Access local respite or recreation programs recommended by your therapist
• Build relationships with school staff who may know your provider

This kind of informal network doesn't replace formal services, but it can be a meaningful source of support, information, and belonging for families who sometimes feel isolated by their child's diagnosis.

What to Look for in a Nepean-Based Autism Provider

When evaluating local autism service providers, consider the following:

Qualified Clinical Staff

Look for programs supervised by Board Certified Behavior Analysts (BCBAs) and staffed by Registered Behavior Technicians (RBTs) or therapists with relevant training. Credentials matter regardless of location.

Flexibility in Service Delivery

Can the provider offer sessions at your home, school, or community settings rather than just a clinical office? This flexibility is essential for the kind of generalization work that drives real-world progress.

Communication and Parent Training

Effective providers keep parents informed and involved. Ask whether parent training is included, how often you'll receive progress updates, and how the team communicates between sessions.

Familiarity with Local Systems

A provider experienced in Nepean should be familiar with local school board processes, Ontario Autism Program navigation, and community resources. This practical knowledge saves families time and reduces the research burden.

Location as Part of a Bigger Decision

Choosing autism services involves many factors. Clinical approach, provider qualifications, availability, and funding compatibility are all important. Location is one piece of that puzzle, but it's a piece that affects every other aspect of your child's program over time.

According to the Ontario Autism Program guidelines, family-centered care, which includes reducing unnecessary burdens on families, is a core principle of quality autism service delivery. Choosing services that are geographically accessible to your family aligns with that principle.

For Nepean families, local, qualified autism support is available. Taking geography into account when making your decision isn't about settling for convenience. It's about setting your family up for the consistency and sustainability that effective autism support genuinely requires.

Our Father Who art in heaven Hallowed be Thy name Thy Kingdom come Thy will be done on Earth as it is in heaven Give us this day our daily Bread And forgive us our trespasses As we forgive those who trespass against us And lead us not into temptation But deliver us from evil

Amen

Jesus is Lord! Come Lord Jesus!

Come Lord Jesus! Christ is Lord!

Jin Jin

The highest of the tidal waves A day for thinking thin To a plebiscite of Lincoln A propos and signs of now This day is his A thirst and not for war Echoing the strange day To fish and their release By Thursday this A plane can land on Water But bend a wheel Inevitably sink And voices cry for help Lose two to Earth This day of Eight on worry What wounds do cost If we lay low Is victory in more than one In radial sin and fully prepared To speak the joy of the Lord Troubles of spirit And hands overboard The state is stateless ground To Earth this Summer With one Jin Mingri Night is still hanging in balance Forfeiting war And releasing all prisoners A glory of Earth in this year And every country Presume this day For missions to know, and how No fear of temperance And wanted for the stars This victory will treat you by far And currences due The way we have trailed Too many unspoken- in faith No to arrests And yes to thy duty A change can still happen- By law.

VVA Sport Olympia Lijf vanuit de Nattedrome te Naapels

Vragenaar der Staat – Welkom en fijn dat je zo snel voor de camera van VVA sport wilt verschijnen voor een kort interview na je gouden medaille op de 1111 meter Prik slee Menno Krenk. Wat gaat er door je heen?

Speler – O man, een droom komt uit, het is niet te geloven. Hier heb ik al die jaren voor gewerkt, en nu sta ik met goud, weergaloos.

Vragenaar der Staat – Het leek alsof de spanning je niks deed?

Speler – Goh, ja, vooraf wel maar eenmaal met de slee op de baan, na het inprikken, was ik die kwijt. Ik kon dankzij de mentale trainingsmethodieken van mijn zen sport therapeut dingen die er niet toe doen vergeten. Dan na het startschot alles stoppen in de prikstok en het ijs, machtig mooi.

Vragenaar der Staat – Je wist meteen dat dit de winnende tijd was?

Speler – Ja, maar er moesten natuurlijk nog 15 ritten komen maar deze rit voelde net zo als die tijdens het WK vorig jaar.

Vragenaar der Staat – Hoe komt het dat je juist bij deze alles of niets wedstrijden zoveel beter bent dan normaal.

Speler – Goh ja, ik denk omdat op zo'n moment iedereen kijkt naar ons terwijl ze anders iets leukers zouden doen. Het is enorm inspirerend om je werk te doen wetende dat zeg maar Trees en Mike op de bank zitten, mij steunen, willen dat ik speciaal voor hun extra hard mijn best doe zodat ik voor het land goud haal. Daar leef ik voor, weet je, normaal kijken alleen mensen die enige interesse in de sport hebben, als ze niet zelf moeten meedoen. Nu voor deze ene keer ben ik voor iedereen een outsider op goud, dan haal ik veel meer uit een slee.

Vragenaar der Staat – Dit succes zal de prik slee sport zeker goed doen!

Speler – Goh nee, dat hoop ik niet, dan moet ik serieus aan de bak om mee te mogen doen aan dit type evenementen, nu hoef ik slechts drie keer per jaar het beste uit mezelf te halen en de rest van het jaar paai ik de paar sponsoren die in het geloof in mij willen investeren. Hopelijk gaat het weer net zoals andere en wordt de prikslee sport meteen weer vergeten na afloop van de spelen.

Vragenaar der Staat – Bedankt voor deze enorme prestatie, Heel Smægmå houdt vandaag van je wel zeker tot aan de uitreiking van het volgend ere metaal voor andere sporten waar iedereen anders zelden naar kijkt. Omdat het er nu wel toe doet al is het alleen voor het kijken in de spiegel die wij zo duidelijk laten zien.

Redenaar der Staat – Welkom terug in de studio. We gaan meteen over naar de kwartatlon waar we het nodige metaal winnend werk mogen verwachten van onze landgenoten.

It didn't snow, so I ran my fastest pace of the year so far around the block. I fulfilled some responsibilities and don't feel the need to game as much, so maybe I'll get out of my rut soon?

Marty Supreme, Josh Safdie (2025)

A frenetic thrill ride beginning in the Lower East Side tenement buildings of NYC to become a globetrotting misadventure, ping-ponging across Europe, Africa, Japan, and New Jersey. Loosely based on real-life Ping Pong shark Marty Reisman, the movie is a mash-up of The Hustler and True Romance.

The plot borders on ridiculous, but the film is fueled by Timothy Chalamet’s charisma, ensnaring us into his madness. Hyper-stylized, with anachronistic needle drops, the movie feels contemporary until you see a car or a rotary phone.

Safdie assembles a cast that includes reality show stars, rappers, and Gwyneth Paltrow. 

See it.

#100WordReviews #Drabble #100DaysToOffload #movies #FilmReview #Cinema #Cinemastodon #JoshSafdie #TimotheeChalamet #MartySupreme #Oscars2026

Assuming you check your email constantly year round, and assuming that you think your HOA is going to contact you with something important by email, and assuming that if your HOA did also contact you via snail mail, that they would actually send that mail to the house you live in in the neighborhood since they definitely know you live there because you have been involved with them through the courts and their attorney and they placed a lien on your house and were foreclosing on it, this is what a violation email looks like:

8/12/2025 at 1:43 PM

Notice of Violation

Dear Resident,

Please note that your association management has identified a violation in relation to your unit. You will find more details below. Please review and take appropriate action as soon as possible.

VIOLATION DETAILS

Violation Type Deed Restriction Violation – Exterior Property Alterations, Signs and Hurricane Shutters

Violation No. 08122025000613

Raised By Management

Date Raised 08/12/2025 02:43 pm

COMPLIANCE REQUIREMENT

According to the Declaration of Covenants, Conditions and Restrictions for the Vista Palms Home Owner’s Association, you are in violation of Section 19.8.1 – Each applicant shall submit an application to the ACC with respect to any proposed improvement or material change in an improvement of any part of the exterior portion of the home. Community Standards 2.0 Alterations – Any exterior property alterations (to the home or the lot) requires the completion of an “Application to Architectural Control Committee” form that must be approved by the ACC.  Community Standards 3.47 Signs and Flags No sign, flag, banner, advertisement, notice or other lettering shall be exhibited, displayed, inscribed, painted o r affixed in, or upon any part of Vista Palms, including without limitation, any Home or Lot, that is visiable from the outside; provided, however, any Owner may display in a respectful manner one (1) one portable, removable official flag of the United States Army, Navy, Air Force, Marine Corps, or Coast Guard, or a POW-MIA flag. Any such permitted flags may not exceed four and one-half feet (4') by six feet (6'). Section 12.18 Hurricane Shutters, Any hurricane shutters or other protective devices visible from the outside of a Home shall be of a type as approved in writing by the ACC and shall match the color or trim of the Home and be of a neutral color. Panel, accordion and roll-up style hurricane shutters may not be left closed during hurricane season (or at any other time). And such approved hurricane shutters may be installed or closed up to forty-eight (48) hours prior to the expected arrival of a hurricane and must be removed or opened within seventy-two (72) hours after the end of a hurricane watch or warning or as the Board may determine otherwise. 

The deadline for continued compliance is Wednesday, September 3, 2025. Please be advised that if the above mentioned violation is not complied with, fines could be assessed.

You will not receive any further notice regarding this issue.

If not in continuous compliance, the issue will be referred to an independent committee of home owners in Vista Palms HOA for consideration of a fine to be imposed in the amount of $100.00 plus daily fines for each day of non-compliance with the fine not to exceed $1000.00, for each violation mentioned above. You should note that each recurrence of this violation of each day during which it continues will be deemed to be a separate offense subject to a separate fine. Fines imposed are considered to be assessments. You are entitled to a hearing on this matter:   The Fining Review Committee will meet on Thursday, September 4, 2025 at 6:15 P.M. in the 5019 Grist Mill Ct. Wimauma, FL 33598 should you want to appear before the committee. You are invited to attend the meeting and present evidence why fines should not be imposed. In the event that you do not bring the violation into compliance by the deadline or you do not show up to the committee meeting, fines may be assessed

VIOLATION DETAILS

Your property is in violation of the above-referenced provision of the Declaration or Guideline because: 

      1. Unapproved Roof Tarp

To cure the violation, please take the following action:         1. Unapproved Roof Tarp Must be Removed

Roger L Kessler LCAM Property Manager E: Rkessler@UniquePropertyServices.com P: 813-879-1139 ext 106 P: 813-879-1039

As you can surmise from my intro, I did not receive this in a timely nor appropriate manner. Hell, the HOA could have physically placed this at my doorstep if they actually wanted a good outcome for me as the homeowner.

My immediate thought was that somehow, my local roofer had put the wrong type of tarp on my house (I specify local roofer because I specifically sought a company that was in my area because there were a lot of fly-by-night companies patrolling the neighborhoods looking for post hurricane business and doing terrible jobs). So, I thought I could simply call the roofer and ask why they would do something like that. It wasn’t until I replied to the “HOA” that I learned that any roof tarp was a modification. Who woulda thunk?

When you want to modify the exterior of what you thought was your house or your yard, you have to apply to your Homeowners Association Architectural Committee. Per my neighborhood, it is as follows (emphasis mine):

Listed here is an abbreviated description of the application process. ACC will only process completed applications, including signatures and accompanying plans and specifications, lot plots, colors, pictures, drawings, etc. Applications must contain all the information necessary for the ACC to make an informed decision or it will be denied.

Within thirty (30) days after receipt by the ACC, the ACC will act on the submission. After review, the original submittal will be retained by the ACC for their files. The ACC will give one of the following responses to each application received:

•“Approved” (project approved as submitted)

•“Conditional Approval” (subject to conditions noted)

•“Denied” (reasons noted in the meeting minutes)

Try not to image the Architectural Committee as a panel of intelligent persons convening in some democratic process for homeowners. Imagine it more like one power hungry capitalist running a business on a typical United States’ reading level of 6th grade but also with an IEP for SLD because no child gets left behind (iykyk). This, and the attorneys that back them, is what homeowners pay for with their fees.

Your HOA, using your neighbors as snitches, can decide that you need to submit to the Architectural Committee after the fact—meaning after you have already modified your home and even though you didn’t know that what you did was indeed a “modification” that required “approval”. And so you believe, in good faith, that the HOA is helping you to follow the process.

Don’t get it twisted. The HOA is not here to help homeowners. They are here to help with the visual aesthetics of the community, people notwithstanding. This is all about “property values”, not human beings.

For further reading and examples, try

• How to File an ARC with Your HOA So That They Can Reject It, and
• Your HOA Gets to Decide What “A Reasonable Timeframe” Is.

Jag måste erkänna något: jag är besatt av statistik. Inte den tråkiga typen med Excel-ark och kakdiagram om företagets försäljningssiffror, utan den riktigt intressanta statistiken – den om mig själv. Och framförallt om min musiksmak. För vad säger mer om en person än vilken musik de lyssnar på klockan tre på natten en tisdagskväll i februari?

Det var så jag hittade Stats.fm, och jag har inte sett tillbaka sedan dess.

Vad är Stats.fm egentligen?

Stats.fm är en tjänst som tar din Spotify-data och förvandlar den till något mycket mer intressant än Spotifys egna “Wrapped” som kommer en gång om året. Istället får du tillgång till detaljerad statistik om din musiklistning i realtid. Ja, du läste rätt – realtid. Varje låt du lyssnar på registreras och bidrar till en ständigt växande databas av information om dina musikvanor.

Det är som att ha en stalker, fast en vänlig sådan som bara vill berätta vilken artist du har lyssnat mest på den här veckan, vilken låt som är din absoluta favorit just nu, och hur många minuter musik du faktiskt konsumerar per dag. Spoiler alert: det är förmodligen fler än du tror.

Varför bry sig om musikstatistik?

Innan jag förklarar varför Stats.fm är så fantastiskt, låt mig först försvara varför någon överhuvudtaget skulle bry sig om musikstatistik. För det är en berättigad fråga. Räcker det inte att bara lyssna på musik?

Jo, visst räcker det. Men musik är så mycket mer än bara ljud som går in i öronen. Musik är minnen, känslor, perioder i livet. När jag tittar på min Stats.fm-profil och ser att jag lyssnade extremt mycket på en viss artist under mars 2024, kommer jag ihåg exakt vad som hände i mitt liv då. Det är som en musikalisk dagbok, fast en som skriver sig själv.

Dessutom – och det här kanske är det viktigaste – så är det helt enkelt jävligt kul. Det finns något tillfredsställande i att se siffror och grafer som representerar något så personligt som musiksmak. Det är som att få kvitto på att man faktiskt är den person man tror att man är. “Ja, jag lyssnar verkligen mycket på indie-pop, siffrorna ljuger inte!”

Så fungerar Stats.fm

När du först registrerar dig på Stats.fm kopplar du ihop ditt Spotify-konto med tjänsten. Därifrån börjar magin hända. Stats.fm börjar spåra allt du lyssnar på – varje låt, varje artist, varje album. Det samlar in denna data och presenterar den på ett sätt som faktiskt är begripligt och intressant att titta på.

Du får se:

• Dina toppartister – både genom tiderna och just nu. Det är fascinerande att se hur rankningen förändras över tid. Min förstaplacerade artist för tre månader sedan är nu bara nummer fem, och jag kan inte för mitt liv komma ihåg varför jag lyssnade så mycket på dem då.

• Dina toplåtar – samma sak här. Vissa låtar fastnar och blir spelrekordhållare, medan andra bara får sin vecka i rampljuset innan de försvinner ner i glömska.

• Lyssningshistorik – en komplett lista över varenda låt du har lyssnat på, i kronologisk ordning. Ja, även den där pinsamma låten klockan halv fyra på morgonen. Ingen dömer (förutom möjligen dig själv när du tittar tillbaka).

• Tidstatistik – hur mycket musik du lyssnar på per dag, vecka, månad. Det här kan bli lite deprimerande när man inser att man har lyssnat på musik i 48 timmar under en enda vecka. Det är två hela dygn. Men samtidigt, vilket sätt att spendera sin tid!

• Genreanalys – vilka genrer dominerar din lyssning? Det här kan vara riktigt upplysande. Jag trodde jag var en rockfantast, men tydligen lyssnar jag mest på elektronisk musik. Vem visste?

Artistsidor och djupdykning

En av de coolaste sakerna med Stats.fm är att det inte bara handlar om dig. Tjänsten har även sidor för varje artist där du kan se deras statistik – hur många som lyssnar på dem via Stats.fm, vilka deras mest populära låtar är bland användarna, och mycket mer.

Ta till exempel den här artisten eller den här. På deras Stats.fm-sidor kan du se exakt hur populära de är inom Stats.fm-communityn, vilket ger en alternativ bild till Spotifys egna popularitetssiffror. Ibland hittar man riktiga pärlor – artister som kanske inte är mainstream-populära men som har en dedikerad lyssnarskara på Stats.fm.

Det är också här man kan upptäcka ny musik på ett lite annorlunda sätt. Istället för att förlita sig på Spotifys algoritm kan man utforska artister baserat på vad andra Stats.fm-användare lyssnar på. Det känns mer… mänskligt, på något sätt.

Sociala funktioner och communities

Stats.fm är inte bara statistik i ett vakuum. Det har även sociala funktioner som gör det möjligt att jämföra din musiksmak med andras. Du kan följa vänner, se vad de lyssnar på just nu, och tävla om vem som har lyssnat mest på en viss artist eller genre.

Det finns även en community-aspekt där användare kan diskutera musik, dela sina profiler, och helt enkelt nerda ner i musikstatistik tillsammans. För oss som tycker om både musik och data är det som att hitta sin stam.

Min egen profil, stats.fm/andbjo, är något jag faktiskt är lite stolt över. Inte för att statistiken är särskilt imponerande, utan för att den representerar så många timmars lyssnande, så många upptäckter, så mycket musik som har format mig som person. Det är som ett digitalt musikmuseum där jag är både curator och besökare.

Stats.fm Plus – är det värt det?

Stats.fm har en gratisversion som faktiskt är väldigt generös med vad den erbjuder. Men det finns också Stats.fm Plus, en premiumversion som kostar en slant men som ger dig tillgång till ännu mer detaljerad statistik och funktioner.

Jag ska vara ärlig: jag har Plus. Och ja, det är värt det om du är lika besatt av musikstatistik som jag är. Du får tillgång till:

• Längre historik – gratisversionen har vissa begränsningar på hur långt tillbaka i tiden du kan se

• Mer detaljerade grafer och analyser

• Exportmöjligheter så du kan ta din data och göra egna analyser (för oss riktiga nördar)

• Prioriterad support

Men om du bara vill kolla på grundläggande statistik och se dina toppartister och låtar fungerar gratisversionen utmärkt.

Jämförelse med andra tjänster

Det finns förstås andra tjänster som gör liknande saker. Last.fm är veteranen på området och har funnits sedan urminnes tider (läs: tidigt 2000-tal). Spotify själva har ju också sin Wrapped som kommer varje december och får hela internet att dela screenshots av sin musiksmak.

Men Stats.fm har några fördelar som gör det unikt:

Realtidsdata – till skillnad från Wrapped som är en årlig sammanfattning ger Stats.fm dig kontinuerlig statistik. Du kan se exakt vad som händer just nu med din lyssning.

Modern design – Last.fm känns, låt oss vara ärliga, lite daterad. Stats.fm har en clean, modern design som faktiskt är trevlig att använda.

Fokus på community – där Last.fm kanske känns lite ensamt har Stats.fm byggt upp en aktiv community av musiknördar som delar din passion.

Djupare analys – statistiken är mer detaljerad och går djupare än vad Spotify själva erbjuder i sin app.

Integritetsfrågor – borde man oroa sig?

Nu säger säkert någon: “Men vänta, du ger ju bort all din lyssningsdata till en tredjepartstjänst!” Och jo, det är ett berättigat perspektiv. Stats.fm får tillgång till din Spotify-data, och även om de säger att de bara använder den för att generera statistik och inte säljer den vidare, är det något man bör vara medveten om.

Personligen har jag landat i att de fördelar jag får – den fantastiska statistiken, community-aspekten, den ständiga överblicken över min musiksmak – är värda den data jag delar. Men det är en personlig avvägning som alla måste göra själva.

Om du är extremt integritetskänslig kanske Stats.fm inte är för dig. Men om du ändå använder Spotify, som i sig samlar in massvis av data om dig, känns steget till Stats.fm inte så stort.

Stats.fm Lyssna – podcasts också!

En nyare funktion som jag tycker förtjänar att lyftas fram är Stats.fm Lyssna. Detta är en utökning av tjänsten som även spårar din podcast-lyssning på samma sätt som musikstatistiken.

För oss som lyssnar på lika mycket podcasts som musik (eller kanske mer, vilket kan vara lite skrämmande att få bekräftat i siffror) är det här en fantastisk tillägg. Du kan se vilka podcasts du lyssnar mest på, hur många timmar du lägger på poddar varje vecka, och bygga upp en komplett bild av ditt totala ljudkonsumtion.

Jag upptäckte genom Lyssna att jag faktiskt lyssnar mer på podcasts än musik vissa veckor, vilket var en ögonöppnare. Det förklarar varför jag alltid känner mig så påläst om random ämnen – jag pumpar ju in information genom hörlurarna konstant.

Tips för att få ut det mesta av Stats.fm

Om du bestämmer dig för att ge Stats.fm en chans (vilket jag verkligen rekommenderar), här är några tips för att få ut maximalt av tjänsten:

Koppla ditt konto så snart som möjligt – ju tidigare du börjar spåra din musik, desto mer komplett blir din historik. Jag ångrar att jag inte hittade Stats.fm tidigare för nu saknar jag data från flera år.

Utforska artistsidor – klicka runt på olika artister du tycker om och se deras statistik. Det är ett bra sätt att hitta liknande musik och se vad andra fans lyssnar på.

Dela din profil – även om du inte är en social media-person, dela din Stats.fm-profil med musikintresserade vänner. Det leder ofta till bra musikdiskussioner och rekommendationer.

Kolla statistiken regelbundet – det är lätt att glömma bort tjänsten efter den initiala entusiasmen, men försök att checka in en gång i veckan eller så. Det håller det intressant och du missar inte hur din musiksmak utvecklas.

Använd det som upptäcktsverktyg – när du ser att du har fastnat i en loop med samma artister kan det vara ett tecken på att det är dags att utforska något nytt.

Varför Stats.fm betyder något

På ett djupare plan tror jag att Stats.fm och liknande tjänster representerar något viktigt i vår digitala tidsålder. Vi genererar så otroligt mycket data varje dag – varje klick, varje stream, varje interaktion. Oftast försvinner denna data bara ut i något företags datacentral där den används för reklam eller produktutveckling utan att vi själva får se den.

Stats.fm ger tillbaka denna data till oss på ett meningsfullt sätt. Det är vår musik, vår tid, våra val – och vi får äntligen se det presenterat på ett sätt som faktiskt betyder något för oss. Det är empowerment genom data, på sätt och vis.

Dessutom skapar det en medvetenhet om våra vanor. När jag ser att jag har lyssnat på musik i 40 timmar en vecka kanske jag funderar på om det är en sund balans i mitt liv. Eller så skiter jag i det och fortsätter lyssna – men åtminstone gör jag ett medvetet val.

Framtiden för musikstatistik

Jag är övertygad om att tjänster som Stats.fm bara kommer att bli mer populära. Vi lever i en tid där vi vill ha data om allt – våra steg, vår sömn, vår träning, och ja, vår musik. Det handlar om självoptimering och självförståelse, men också om den rena nyfikenheten på våra egna mönster.

Jag hoppas att Stats.fm fortsätter utvecklas och lägger till fler funktioner. Kanske AI-drivna musikrekommendationer baserade på djupare analys av lyssningsvanor? Kanske integration med fler musikplattformar än bara Spotify? Möjligheterna är oändliga.

Slutsats – är Stats.fm för dig?

Om du har läst hela vägen hit och fortfarande är intresserad, då ja, Stats.fm är definitivt för dig. Om du någonstans under läsningen tänkte “det här låter som för mycket information om något så enkelt som att lyssna på musik”, då kanske det inte är din grej. Och det är helt okej.

För mig har Stats.fm blivit en daglig del av min musikupplevelse. Jag kollar mina stats lika ofta som jag kollar väder-appen (vilket kanske säger mer om mig än jag vill erkänna). Det har gett mig en djupare förståelse för min musiksmak, hjälpt mig upptäcka nya artister, och framförallt gett mig oändliga timmar av nöje när jag nerdar ner i grafer och siffror.

Så om du är musikälskare och dessutom tycker om statistik, ge Stats.fm en chans. Skapa ett konto, koppla din Spotify, och börja din resa in i den fascinerande världen av musikdata. Och när du väl är där, känner du säkert samma som jag: hur kunde jag lyssna på musik utan det här tidigare?

Min profil finns på stats.fm/andbjo om du vill kolla hur en Stats.fm-besatt persons statistik ser ut. Döm mig gärna för min musiksmak – jag har redan dömt mig själv när jag såg hur många gånger jag har lyssnat på samma låt i rad.

Lycka till med din egen musikstatistikresa. Och kom ihåg: det är inte stalking om det är du själv du stalkar.

The Brutal Arithmetic of Strategic Autonomy

By Publius (of the 21st Century) — No. 5

The Munich Security Conference 2026 will be remembered not for what was said, but for what was not. Secretary of State Marco Rubio delivered a speech heavy on civilizational rhetoric but conspicuously silent on Article 5 guarantees, nuclear commitments, or European input into Ukraine negotiations. The message beneath the reassuring words was clear: Europe is on its own timeline now, whether it's ready or not.

Echoing a notion in a previous brief formulated here, Robert Kagan, when speaking to Christiane Amanpour on CNN days earlier, put it bluntly: Europe finds itself “caught between an aggressor and a predatory empire to its east, but also now a potentially predatory, but certainly hostile empire to its west.” This is not hyperbole. It is the new structural reality that European leaders must navigate.

The European Response: Divergent Paths, Common Imperative

The three major European speeches at Munich revealed both progress and paralysis. Chancellor Friedrich Merz delivered perhaps the clearest-eyed assessment, explicitly acknowledging that “a divide has opened up between Europe and the United States” and that “the battle of cultures of MAGA in the US is not ours.” More importantly, Merz grasps the fundamental connection between competitiveness and security: “In this new world, competitiveness policy is security policy, and security policy is competitiveness policy.” This represents a conceptual breakthrough for German strategic thinking.

Prime Minister Keir Starmer maintained Britain's traditional Atlantic orientation, emphasizing that “the US remains an indispensable power” while acknowledging the need for “radical renewal” rather than rupture. His speech threaded the needle between European integration and American partnership, offering British defense industrial capacity (25% of Europe's total) and nuclear cooperation with France as bridges rather than choosing sides.

President Emmanuel Macron was most assertive about European autonomy, declaring “No peace without the Europeans” and establishing a direct communication channel with Russia. His emphasis on “European preference” in defense procurement and his warning that “if this money is used just to have national solutions... we will waste our money” represents the most protectionist position among the three leaders.

Yet for all their differences, the three converged on essentials: Russia remains an existential threat even after any Ukraine settlement; Europe must achieve strategic autonomy; and the 5% GDP defense spending target is necessary but not sufficient. The Coalition of the Willing now finances 100% of Western military support to Ukraine. Europe has already replaced America as Ukraine's primary backer—a fact, not an aspiration.

The German Awakening and Its Limits

Merz's clarity on German security imperatives contrasts sharply with his population's preparedness. Recent Nordic military visitors to Berlin observed, as Der Spiegel reported, that Germany risks becoming “a danger and liability in its geographic position” because Germans instinctively “look the other way” when danger looms. Decades of ideological disarmament—the peace dividend taken as permanent entitlement—cannot be reversed by speeches alone.

Yet Germany grasps at least one asymmetric advantage: Ukrainian combat experience. German-Ukrainian drone co-production represents more than arms deals; it's recognition that Ukraine possesses what no Western military has—four years of high-intensity warfare against a peer adversary using AI-enabled autonomous systems. This knowledge transfer could prove more valuable than any American weapons system Europe might purchase.

The bitter irony is tactical: the longer Ukraine fights and decimates Russian capabilities, the more time Europe gains to prepare. Russia's “defensive industry on a sugar high” (Macron's phrase) cannot sustain current casualty rates indefinitely. European intelligence estimates suggest a 5-year window before Russian reconstitution. But this assumes Ukraine maintains resistance—and that Europe uses the time wisely.

The Macron Paradox: Autonomy Without Sharing

Macron's “European preference” and direct Russia channel position France as would-be leader of European strategic autonomy. Yet his vision contains a fatal contradiction: he demands European power but resists the burden-sharing that power requires.

France's nuclear deterrent remains under absolute national control. Macron offers “dialogue” with European partners about how Europe factors into French vital interests—but not shared command, not consultation requirements, not automatic extension of deterrence. Germany's Merz has begun nuclear talks with Macron “fully embedded in our nuclear sharing within NATO,” but what does “European nuclear deterrence” mean if France retains unilateral launch authority and Germany constitutionally cannot possess weapons?

Similarly, Macron's insistence on European defense industrial champions—FCAS, MGCS, ELSA—assumes other Europeans will wait 15 years for French-led programs to mature while Russia reconstitutes in 5. Poland's massive procurement of American, South Korean, and Turkish systems reveals the market's verdict: when facing existential threat, speed trumps sovereignty. France must either accelerate timelines or accept that European preference will remain rhetorical.

The British Dilemma: Bridge to Nowhere?

Starmer's positioning as “Atlantic bridge” only works if both banks hold. His offer of closer single-market alignment “in other sectors” in exchange for defense industrial integration is strategically sound—Britain controls 25% of European defense capacity and brings nuclear weapons plus Five Eyes intelligence access.

But the bridge strategy fails if America disengages before Europe achieves autonomy. Rubio's Article 5 silence suggests exactly this trajectory. Britain then becomes not a bridge but an island—outside the EU framework, dependent on an unreliable American guarantee, unable to access European defense financing mechanisms.

The UK must make a harder choice than Starmer's speech suggests: either full defense and economic integration with Europe (requiring painful political concessions on regulatory alignment) or continued Atlantic dependence on an America that may no longer extend its nuclear umbrella. The middle path—partnership without commitment—serves neither British nor European interests.

Kagan's Predators and the Eastern Europeans

Eastern Europeans understand predatory empires viscerally. Poland's procurement decisions—$160 billion on American, South Korean, and Turkish systems—reflect threat assessment, not industrial policy. When Macron criticizes buying non-European, Poles hear French industrial protectionism, not European solidarity.

This is where Kagan's framework illuminates European divisions. Eastern Europeans face an immediate predator (Russia) and a potentially predatory partner (America). Their solution: arm immediately with whatever works, maintain American forward presence as tripwire, build European capability as hedge. They cannot afford to wait for FCAS to mature in 2040 when Russia may attack in 2031.

Western Europeans, particularly France, face a different calculation. The predator is less immediate, the opportunity to build autonomous capability more attractive, the patience for 15-year industrial programs greater. But this temporal divergence threatens coalition coherence. If Eastern Europeans conclude that Western Europe prioritizes industrial policy over their security, they will deepen Atlantic ties regardless of American unreliability—because an uncertain American guarantee beats a certain French or German industrial program.

Five Imperatives for European Action

Europe's 5-year window requires concrete action, not more speeches. Five imperatives emerge from Munich's contradictions:

First: Operationalize the Coalition of the Willing. Europe already finances Ukraine's defense 100%. Formalize this into permanent European defense financing mechanism with transparent governance, clear burden-sharing, and decision-making that includes but does not require American participation. The €90 billion Ukraine loan with “European preference” in procurement creates the institutional foundation. Build on it.

Second: Accelerate nuclear cooperation—with burden-sharing. Merz-Macron bilateral talks must expand to include UK and evolve toward genuine shared deterrence. This requires French concession of some autonomy and German acceptance that “European nuclear deterrence” means French/British weapons defending Germany. If France will not share, and Germany will not possess, European nuclear deterrence remains slogan not strategy. Poland and Baltics will maintain dependence on American umbrella, undermining European autonomy.

Third: Resolve the defense industrial trilemma through hybrid procurement. Europe cannot simultaneously achieve speed, European champions, and efficiency. Solution: immediate needs (ammunition, drones, air defense) procured pragmatically from best available sources; long-term strategic capabilities (FCAS, MGCS, ELSA) maintained as European sovereignty investments with extended timelines accepted. This requires Paris to tolerate non-European procurement for urgent needs, and Eastern Europeans to support European programs for future requirements.

Fourth: Integrate Ukraine fully into European security architecture. Ukraine's military is Europe's most combat-experienced force, battle-testing AI-enabled autonomous systems against peer adversary. Ukrainian drone warfare expertise, being co-developed with Germany, represents asymmetric advantage over American systems optimized for counterinsurgency. Include Ukraine in European defense industrial base now, not after some theoretical EU accession. Extend security guarantees that make renewed Russian aggression suicidal. Honor the Budapest Memorandum promises through deed, not rhetoric.

Fifth: Force UK-EU defense-economic integration. Starmer's offer of closer single-market alignment in exchange for defense integration must be accepted—quickly. Britain outside EU but inside European defense makes no sense long-term. Europe needs UK's 25% of defense industrial base, nuclear weapons, intelligence capabilities. UK needs European market access and collective security. Political obstacles to regulatory alignment pale beside strategic imperative. If Britain will not integrate economically, it cannot integrate militarily. If Europe will not accommodate British sovereignty concerns, it forfeits 25% of its defense capacity.

The Brutal Arithmetic

Russia's reconstitution timeline is approximately 5 years. European strategic autonomy—genuine ability to deter Russian aggression without American guarantee—requires 10-15 years if starting from scratch. Europe is not starting from scratch; it has two nuclear powers, significant industrial base, and coalition that already finances Ukraine's defense. But it has barely half the time needed.

The mathematics are brutal but not impossible. Every month Ukraine fights is one more month Europe gains for preparation. Every delay in European integration is one month lost. The choice is not between American partnership and European autonomy—that choice was already made the moment Washington replaced alliance with hierarchy, masked by Rubio's civilizational rhetoric. The choice is between European autonomy achieved rapidly through painful compromise, or European subordination to whichever predator proves most aggressive.

Merz sees this clearly. Macron sees parts of it. Starmer tries to bridge it. But seeing clearly is not enough. The Nordic soldiers visiting Berlin identified Germany's danger: looking away when crisis looms. Europe's danger is broader: debating industrial policy while the window closes, negotiating burden-sharing while Russia rebuilds, protecting national sovereignty while losing collective security.

Munich 2026 revealed that Europe at least understands its predicament. The test is whether understanding translates to timely action before the 5-year window slams shut. The predators—east and west—are watching.

livi brought me to the hundezone with the kind of excitement she only feels when seeing snow again. the moment we arrived, she launched her tiny body in the air with this joyful sprint, running from one side to the other, glancing back as if she was inviting me into her game. so I followed. we played peekaboo between the trees, she had her white tail drawing little arcs of happiness in the air. my earphones playing “Volta” from Tim Bernardes, a song my best friend shared with me, as he always does, time to time. the epitome of our friendship. now she’s leaping around like a small, excited horse, because that’s who she is, a creature who turns everything into something else, like an alchemist, like a child who still remembers how to play with the world. she stares at me with those black marble ball eyes of hers as if telling me: see? you're still there. and then, in the reflection of a parked car, I catch a glimpse of myself, and right there, completely unexpectedly, 6 AM of an ordinary thursday, I notice that I’m smiling again.

/feb26

Wide awake at 2:00 am today; the long journey of overcoming jetlag begins. Hopefully I don't collapse mid workshop tomorrow. Three workshops back-to-back, no mercy for the lecturing artist flying in from across the globe.

I intentionally didn't pack much clothes, because I knew I already had a bunch stored in Houston. In raiding my storage unit for apparel, I discovered in horror the amount of completely unnecessary stuff I had stored in there (like, why on Earth would I store a wastebin?). There's plenty of very important stuff in there (So. Many. Books.), enough to warrant keeping the unit, but too much nonsense that gets in the way of finding the good stuff. I just might make it my mission to clear out everything I'm happy to discard while I'm here, time permitting. Definitely no time to list/sell anything, but as luck would have it, there's a Goodwill just across the street from the storage spot. Perfect.

Ramadan commences back in Cairo today. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't happy to be missing it.

#journal